Guerlain Spa

Couples massage was awful. 18% Gratuity included. My husband said he felt «beat up» afterwards.

Short notice, eve of Christmas Eve, Mark Drapes made himself available and gave me an outstanding wash and blow-​dry and was friendly and thoughtful. Kudos, given the holiday crush.

Mark Grapes is AWESOME! I have never been happier with my hair color :) I went in there knowing what I wanted, but not really having the best picture/​sample to provide, yet he gave me more than what I expected. I have had so many compliments on my hair! Thanks Mark!

If you are looking for a top stylist and colorist make an appointment with Mark Grapes. While visiting New Orleans my wife was lucky enough to get an appointment with Mark, she had three processes; color, highlights, and cut, and she says her hair looks the best it’s looked in years!!! She has traveled from Philadelphia to have Mark do my hair again, and it was worth the trip because she is again happy with the style and color of her hair!

I had a 90-​minute massage… I think, because I’m prettttyyyy sure I lapsed into a coma about a quarter of the way in. :-/
Best massage I’ve ever had– and I’ve had a lot of massages. I love that the masseuse actually listened to what I said I wanted and then executed. Perfect amount of pressure, and no painful kneading out knots in my upper back, which I HATE. Despite me saying this, it seems to be a staple practice at other places and takes up about half an hour of the massage.
Loved the spa itself, beautiful, serene, and calming inside the massaging room and with plenty of room with a bathroom. Great music, aroma, and no outside noises. After the massage and peeling myself off the table, I finally emerged from the room and my masseuse had a complementary mimosa waiting for me. (Champagne, wine and water are also options.) In the relaxing room, there are a variety of snacks, bottled Evian water, cucumber water, & orange water.
I didn’t get to play in the rooftop pool or workout but plan to another time.
Also, they validate for Roosevelt Hotel valet parking. ;)
I’LL BE BACK!

Best sports massage I have ever had outside of my hometown massage therapist. Runners and Triathletes must see Cliff when you are in town. Worth the spa price.

If your living or just visiting New Orleans — Mark Grapes stylist has you covered. He is the most talented hair stylist I’ve seen!

Holy Miracle Facial! wowwee! I just had a «Skin-​Saver men’s Facial» from Krystal. She is a skin goddess… my skin is so smooth and and i am so so relaxed, and i usually don’t like facials… Krystal was very professional and kept the champagne flowing the whole time… she even gave me a complimentary eyebrow shaping… and the ambiance of the spa and treatment rooms is so luxurious and opulent that I felt like Egyptian royalty, i almost expected to be offered sacrificial blood to be bathed in… well worth your money!!!

I can’t comment on the spa services yet, but I want to talk about Mark Grapes, the hair stylist there. He’s actually been styling my hair for years now, and I followed him over to the Guerlain Spa. I highly recommend him– he’s friendly, makes you feel at ease, and most importantly, does good hair. I’m always getting compliments on my haircuts. The surroundings are posh and comfortable. His salon is private which is also a nice touch. All this combined with a 20% discount to locals from Sunday through Thursday and complimentary valet parking make the experience wonderful.

Habiba is a talented hair stylist that specializes in all hair types from European to styling dread locks. She was very professional and easy going. I normally style my own hair; however, her skill level is well worth my time and the price the salon demands. Thanks Habiba for making look picture perfect!

I opted to get a pedicure at this spa because it was expensive — and Guerlain. How could it not be luxurious?
Here’s how:
1. I chose the «Complete Pedicure» — one hour dedicated to my feet. My friend chose the «Classic» — 40 minutes. When I booked the appointments, I was told that we would be back to back, as only one woman was working. When we arrived, Sharon (said woman) said she would work on us at the same time… and did. It really detracted from the experience.
2. None of the materials (minus the polish — Lippman) were any better than materials used for $ 30 pedicures.
3. No foot massage.
4. Shabby polish job.
For $ 150 (including gratuity), I expected a lot more. Guerlain only received two stars because we were offered free mimosas and the pedicure chairs were great.

I am disposed to love a spa. Spas, to me, are for the experience: woo-​woo music in the background, clean, crisp surroundings, towels I can’t afford, manufactured serenity – I love it all. This is why I was completely shocked by my experience here. I expected to be swaddled in a nubbly bathrobe and marched directly to luxurious pummeling, followed by an easy dip in a hot tub and generally amoeba-​ing around in relaxation.
I was excited as I stood in the lobby, waiting for my staff member to conduct me to the locker room. There were perfumes and fancy pillows all over the place, and it was about what I expected from something like this. The rest of it, however, was rather unimpressive. The trek to the locker room bluntly leads into the gym, and the locker room itself is about what I’d expect from the average YMCA/​JCC/​gym. The bathrobes are terry cloth, which isn’t so bad, but these were thin and rough. Not quite the nubbly awesomeness I was expecting. Then, my friend and I kind of wandered awkwardly into the lobby (with grand front doors that face the street) but stood there in our robes while we tried to figure out if it was «okay» to enter what we thought was the «spa portal.» Mind you, we were shivering, naked but for our robes, and just… awkward. Most spas have a tastefully hidden pathway from locker rooms to spa area. The Guerlain Spa of New Orleans, however, does not. Abrupt transitions abound. The «spa portal» was actually the best part of the experience, which in this case was a room filled with Guerlain products, giant comfy chairs, and trashy magazines galore. This room I liked. I was quickly retrieved from this room and led to another – actually gorgeous – concourse filled with the therapy rooms, and was introduced to the most awful massage therapist I have ever encountered.
The massage. Oh, the massage. It was awful. The appointment did not begin with a discussion of problem areas, there were no questions about possible injuries, no consultation of any kind. Instead, I was hurried under the blanket, and then manhandled for an hour. I have never ended a massage without thinking, «Damn, I hate that this is over.» That is, until now, when I winced my way through what can only be described as an utterly painful experience. I asked her repeatedly to reduce the pressure of the massage, but she did not reach a level that was tolerable. I almost thought she was angry at me. Is that neurotic? I kept thinking maybe it was me, maybe I was missing the point of the «style,» but a massage therapist friend told me afterward that my experience was completely inappropriate.
When the massage was over, my MT ushered me quickly down the hall and through the «buy our stuff!» area (completely bypassing the fancy coffee distribution kiosk!), leading me by arm straight to the locker room. She walked off without a word.
I understand that, you know, having a problem with your *spa experience* is a pretty snotty first-​world problem to have. Here’s the thing: I like massages. I work a lot. I wanted to treat myself to a luxurious experience to celebrate the new year. I said, «Yeah, this massage is expensive as shit, but it will HAVE to be amazing.» I’ve been to spas before, and they are always comfortable, welcoming, new age-​y, and generally overwhelmingly pleasant. This is the most expensive massage I’ve ever purchased, and the experience wasn’t even lackluster – it was downright bad.
Being rushed through the premises, barely acknowledged by the massage therapist, pummeled within an inch of my muscles’ lives, given cheaply-​made robes and towels, through a structure that is awkwardly constructed and dumps customers into abrupt transitions from public spaces to private, all of these things created the most awful spa experience I’ve ever had. I’m not sure why I’m giving it two stars. Maybe they get an extra star for not being infested with roaches or something.
And the final blow? There isn’t even a readily accessible hot tub or sauna from the locker room. I hate sounding rednecky, but these creature comforts tend to come with the giant price tag.

This is an amazing addition to the New Orleans spa community. It is serene, expensive, and offers the gamut of services. Yes, it’s expensive, but parking gets validated, and your gratuity is included in the price of the service. I had my brows done, and Cassandra took me from a budding Wolverine to a natural, feminine arch in no time. For those who enjoy Guerlain products, the waiting area is also a mini shopping area to pick up some Terracotta bronzer or fragrance without heading to a department store.
While there are showers, couples rooms, and Vichy shower, what is missing is a the chance to make your visit a full-​on day spa experience: no sauna or steam room for pre– or post-​treatments.