Bruno Jamais

Bruno Jamais has closed.

Bruno’s is ridic. But it’s fun. In between the «working» girls and the older gentlemen flashing their money (confesh: i may have torn through a few bottles of cristal here before) it’s fun and cheesy (bonus cheesy points: I sat next to charo last time i was here)
only reason for a docked star: last time we stopped in they decided we werent dressed appropriately (we both had on sneakers) and they forced us to sit at a table rather than grab a drink at a bar. i understand there is a dress code… but i dont like being told what to do and also, we are pretty good customers. just suck it up and let us grab a quick drink at the bar or tell us we’re not dressed appropriately. don’t try to get our money AND make us sit at a table in the corner.

wow, these ratings surprise me. I went late one night because everything else was closed, and we found the décor to be cheesy, cheesy cheesy! Zebra-​face painting, a bedsheet with paint hanging from the ceiling, wine glasses hanging from a chandelier. hm. ScCcary. Don’t get me started on the crowd. Everyone seemed to be over 45 yrs. old, and the place was peppered with tourists. Major Cheesiness Factor!

French food is expected to be good and everyone knows that, therefore if you own a French restaurant you better be ready to deliver. Bruno Jamais has definitely grasped this concept.
First they set the mood by creating a façade that simply looks like you are walking into a townhouse on the upper east side. Next the host walks you through a corridor to the dimly lit dinning area which includes a full bar.
I dined here with a friend and we decided that if we were going to have the best French experience possible, we would try to be as French as possible. So…
For the first course I went with the tuna tar tar, oh my, paired with a chunky mango salsa and slices of avocado my meal was off to a great start. Next the chef sent over a bit of lobster bisque for us to try and I remember it having perfect buttery tones, with large chunks of lobster. Next I enjoyed a standard crunchy garden salad with fresh parm cheese.
Did I mention the wine, WOW. The list is so extensive it could definitely be intimidating for a novice. We asked for a suggestion between two bottles that had sparked our interest and they happily guided us in the right direction.
For the entrée I had to go for a great seafood dish with a splendid sauce (hopefully). I had the halibut in a sort of tomato cream reduction sauce… so delicious and a side of sauteed asparagus.
NOTE (about the crowd): I will say there was an obvious mix of older Men and younger Women which was a bit interesting, but if you can get over a few silly people who clearly come for other reasons besides good food, this is a truly amazing French restaurant.

I NEVER thought i could party on the Upper East Side, it seemed like such a boring idea, doesn’t everyone travel downtown?
I am a sucker for secret places so I agreed to check it out.
There was no sign on the door, it looked like we were going to visit someone’s home and there was even a heavy sliding glass door to conquer in the interior before we were granted entrance.
I don’t even like American food.
This was American/​French food done surprisingly well.
As my friend warned, lots of singles here looking to hook up with sugar daddies/​mommas.
but, still a lot of fun in a yuppie conservative contrived older desperate way of matchmaking. older crowd more money corporate singles scene, big groups of people having fun, or Fridays, when everyone brings their wives.
Hung out with some crazy famous heirs here, but really, it’s not the scene of human drama, it’s the great food: I’ll be back for the tender baby back ribs that would make any vegetarian reconsider, the espresso martinis that will keep you awake for hours, and the exquisite fois gras that comes with the scallop combo. delicious. I liked the french fries. Very good in the McDonald’s kind of way.
If you come by later, be prepared to dance your a** off to old old old school hits but it doesn’t matter, you’ll be so wasted on their fantastic drinks that you won’t remember a thing.
P. S.DO NOT BRING HOME ANYONE YOU MEET HERE. It is too cliché.

In honor of my dear friend Allison G. walking this earth for 27 years, we tonight decided to dine in fine style at one of the most stylish restaurants around, Bruno Jamais.
It also offered a hot deal — Allison G. had recently won a Bruno Jamais gift certificate (no other than in this column!) and we decided her birthday would be a most excellent excuse to throw all thoughts of our diet to the wind and enjoy.
An early date (we are growing long in the whiskers), we were greeted by an almost empty restaurant and pretty much had all the severs to ourselves. Our main server, Burak, was *awesome* and helpful from the very first serving of bread. (I say first because, when we finished the bread basket, he personally went in back to toast us some more bread!)
As we muddled over our appetizer selection (we eventually went with the sublime Tuna TarTare), Burak bought us two on-​the-​house special dishes — first a creamy mushroom risotto, and then, delicious fried crab cakes! We nearly died.
(From pleasure. Sex has found a fine rival in French cuisine.)
For our main course, Allie had the Dover Soul, which came with mushroom gnocchi, and me, Filet Mignon with pommes purée and caramelized onions (which we then sampled the other of). I eat red meat maybe once every six months, but when I do… it’s a biblical moment. We then enjoyed fresh-​baked Madeline cookies with our coffee (also a special on-​the-​house treat!) as we waited for our crème brûlée and chocolate soufflé to ready. (Yes, they baked us a mini cake. Molten fudge.)
A night where as you go to pee your waiter clears your crumbs and folds your napkin, and pulls out your chair when you return is something we should all experience once in the while. Makes the nitty gritty of running amok all day in shoes that hurt and hair that needs a deep-​conditioning feel a lot more worthwhile.
Now I return to my food coma. Tomorrow I detox.

Thank you Bruno Jamais for helping me balance out the rest of my star ratings. Because of this place, I had to re-​evaluate all of my other ratings.
The Duo Foie Gras was on point. The Filet Mignon was done a little too well for my medium rare, but delicious. The wines list was not a million pages deep, but a very outstanding range, with the replacement suggestion perfect for the appetizers.
The other reviews captures the atmosphere very well. It was a comfortable environment and my favourite feature was the deadening of all cell phone signal, which leaves the area what it is… an oasis

Awesome and unique date place that is quintessential NYC. Beautiful, modern, speakeasy-​esque dining room hidden in a parkside townhouse. The crowd is a mix of the beautiful (a lot of big groups of UES socialite types and a lot of hilarious Euros) and the bizarre (Russian mobsters and slick older business men on the prowl). Everybody’s in a party mood (there’s even a secret smoking room downstairs) and fun music kicks on around 10 as every open space turns into a dance floor. The food is almost secondary, but was outstanding with a creative and diverse menu — the Lobster 2 ways (capuccino and brulee) was phenomenal and the fried gnocchi was a nice take on high end bar grub. Portions are small and the place is expensive (and expect to pay for bottled water — tap was not offered), but I would go back in a heartbeat for the people watching, the eclectic music and the laughs. (Added bonus — late night snack menu is outstanding)

A smart top shelf spot. Thick comfy couches and chairs, complete with a DJ make the place. Old rich guys with super young girls, its here. Single and devorced women, late 30s to early 50’s, stylishly ‘hang out’, looking for a good time. They are here too. Bring your wallet, the plastic, one can easily spend hundereds of dollars in a moment or two…

Looking for a place to seriously impress a date… Guaranteed she has never been there (neither have you)… swank, prohibition-​esque, food to die for, gorgeous people, dancing, music, big bucks!!! What more could you want.