Kings

Conveniently located across the street from Bamboo nightclub, I frequently end up in here after a night out. It can only be described as a war-​zone at 3am, as hordes of drunks spill through the door in search of something that will sponge up the cheap Jäger bombs and vodka in their stomachs. Expect to see everything from crying girls, bodies passed out on tables, people snapchatting their drunk pal and the occasional Yaya/​Kolo Toure chant.
Kings do everything from pizzas to kebabs and the type of food which you would only order when you’re ruined. Of course it tastes like the best thing in the world at the time, but Kings’ cuisine has a nasty habit of reversing up your oesophagus either in the street outside, in the taxi home, or the morning after. Whether this is due to the quality of the food or the excessive amount of alcohol that preceded it, or both, I cannot say for definite.
Kings is also home to the legendary «Munchie Box». The Munchie Box offers a selection of Kings delicacies including chips, donnar, pakora, and other undistinguishable items of food, all for a modest £8, you won’t need to (or won’t be able to) eat for days.
In summary, this isn’t exactly the type of place you would take your gran for lunch. But when it comes to dirty food at the end of a night out, Kings will sort you out.

It’s just a pity the staff are all as miserable as sin :-(
In recent months Glasgow’s been in the middle of a bun-​based arms race. Over a decade ago Daniel Boulud’s restaurant put the DB burger on his menu. It cost $ 32 and people gasped — «It’s a brazen liberty to take with a burger!» But people bought it and bought in, eventually reaching its meaty conclusion with the gourmet-​burger restaurant.
Not that this sit-​in grease spoon burger, kebab and pizza joint care. They’re quite happy serving frozen burgers, chips and a can for a few quid* to students and fast food junkies like me. This «burger revolution» has passed them by, but no bad thing! There’s a time and place for queuing around the block to savour that handmade steak patty that the chef’s so evangelical about, but for other quick on the foot times this will do nicely — but only just.
*£3.20 at time of writing.