Heartbeats Café

So The Tax Deduction is in the ER at the Children’s Hospital, we are pretty sure it’s appendicitis and we’ve been in hospital waiting pattern in that little room for hours. This is the second time in a week we’ve done this rodeo. The Wife and I decide that we need to eat something so we take turns headed down to the Heartbeat in the Atrium.
Since it is in a hospital you’re not really expecting much you think to yourself as you stroll passed the children’s garden and down toward Radiology (wondering how close that food actually gets to the radiation). How mistaken you find you are, it’s in a small space but there is plenty of seating out in the atrium. The line kind of forms, you’re never really sure, but eventually you get up to a cash register and get to order. Each time I’ve been here it’s been lunch time. I like the Build Your Own Sandwich option. Pick bread, meat, cheese, veggies and spreads, you get some plain chips with it and it’s a darn reasonable price, about $ 5.00
I usually go with Ciabatta roll, ham, provolone and a dijon mayo spread, they don’t skimp on the lettuce or pickles either. They have other chips, ice cream, all sorts of breakfast options, many drink options including a soda fountain and really huge cookies.
If you got to be in the Legacy Hospital complex and you need to feed yourself this is pretty good option. It is also open 24/​7, so they’re always there for you. While I hope I never have to come back with my kid in the ER, it’s nice to know that at least I can get a good meal out of the deal.
Oh, The Tax Deduction? Turned out to be a viral infection that was irritating the lymph nodes. A day later, he came down with strep. At least we can treat that at home.

If I could give this place a zero I would. Yesterday my food tasted like soap. Today, my salad was disgusting and the lettuce was brown. It’s a hospital where I should be able to trust the food. I really don’t.

I work in the hospital and have eaten here a thousand times. It definitely gets old after eating there regularly for years, but if you’re here for a short time, they have some pretty good options. The only exception is the gluten free cupcakes. They are terrible. I don’t know why they are still there.

Let’s be honest: if you’re eating in a hospital, you’re probably not on a date, and you’re probably not having that great a day. So, it would be a little silly to judge this place by the standards of haute cuisine.
Pros:
— good vegetarian selection: veggie sausage available with all breakfasts;
— the deli case gets high volume rotation, so everything in it is fresh — I’d be surprised if you see anything older than 8 hours — and has a wide-​ranging selection of everything from sushi to chicken enchiladas;
— their personal pizzas are actually pretty good — I expected little frozen pies with mystery ingredients, but they appear to be freshly made, and the toppings are definitely fresh;
— not sure if it’s run as a non-​profit or what, but the prices are extremely low — presumably not trying to make buck off people who are more or less trapped at the hospital for food options;
— the staff clearly understand that in addition to service hospital workers and day-​visitors, they are serving people who are patients or who have family members who are patients, and for whom the world is a difficult place at the moment — they’re gracious, helpful and entirely pleasant.
Cons:
— Very limited menu. If you’re stuck eating her for more than 2 days, you should expect depression to set in;
— I would avoid the cheeseburger special. Tried it twice (slow learner), and its got some kind of crazy, one might even say apocalyptic, heartburn-​inducing qualities.

Two years ago I was introduced to the Chicken Guacamole sandwich and it nearly changed my life. Both the sandwich and I have been gone for a while — but now we’re both back!
Imagine a warm, grilled chicken breast supported by melted cheese, guacamole, black olives, lettuce, and tomato. Imagine using ciabatta bread to deliver these items to your palate. The brown box that it comes in is like a Christmas gift. The side of Lays potato chips is worthy of a thank you note.

Just inside the atrium of Emanuel Hospital sits Heartbeats Café — the culinary hub of the medical offices, the main hospital and the Emergency Department. With EKG graphics and a «24÷7» scrawled across the windows, this spot is THE place to fuel up on food or caffeine at all hours of the day. The café itself is nestled in to the side of the medical offices building but the seating area is out under a five-​story ceiling in a wide open area that’s perfect for dining, taking a break from work, or huddling up with loved ones while you wait for someone to get out of the ED.
The fare at Heartbeats Café is, at first blush, your standard selection of pre-​packaged salads, sandwiches, ready-​to-​heat meals, coffee, tea, sodas, bottled drinks and desserts plus a surprise host of hot soups, grilled sandwiches and a few other offerings. You don’t walk in there expecting much but you’ll be surprised by how actually okay this food is. I mean, by Portland culinary standards it ain’t worth a return visit, but compared to some of the slop I’ve had in the cafeterias at big institutions like this, it’s not half bad.
It’s a counter-​service kind of joint and the folks that are working there even at 11pm on Christmas Eve-​Eve are plenty helpful and friendly. The customers are a crazy mix of staff and visitors — most of whom are collecting themselves from whatever ordeal that brought them, and the patient they’re waiting for, to the ED. The knife, fork and «multi-​purpose spoon» (as opposed to the single-​purpose spoon?) dispensers are the one-​armed bandits of the food world. Everything here is extremely inexpensive (a 16oz cup of chili for $ 1.80? Yes please!). And while it wouldn’t be my first dining choice had I the flexibility to leave and get food in the nearby areas, when you’re stuck waiting for someone and you can’t leave… and especially when you need some blood sugar to deal with whatever has put you here in the first place, Heartbeats Café does just fine.
But I do have to say… that bright green key lime pie looks really suspicious.
Fast, friendly, convenient, and… well… okay food. Is that worth 3 stars? Maybe if I had to eat here every day I’d say no. But honestly, compared to what I was expecting, this was A-​OK in a pinch.