International Salon & Day Spa

Encarta: Spa /​spaa/​n. 1. health spa 2. a resort with mineral springs 3. whirlpool bath a tub with a device for aerating or swirling water (—I know, Encarta is not the editor’s Bible, but it IS a dictionary.
What is the deal, people? Why is this term being tossed around so whimsically? Ok, your sink has a clog and is filled with water. You plunge it. Air bubbles rise and break at the surface. Are you now a spa? Your nephew passes gas in the bathtub. Air bubbles float to the top of the water, break the surface, and reach your nostrils. He had broccoli for dinner. Eeww… not the sulfur springs you were hoping for? Is it a spa? Well, is it?
Dear owner of International Blah, Blah, Blah: YOU ARE NOT A SPA..
1) Were you professional and courteous? No. You were 25 minutes late to our appointment. Judge Joe Brown and the like aired on the shop’s TV. You had a spring water bubbler that dispensed cold and hot water, and a wide variety of teas, but offered neither while I waited or after. Where were your manners?
2) Were you immaculate? No. There was a thin layer of dust on every stack of magazines and every table and chair except yours and mine. Your salon is too big to be run by one person.
3) Did I leave feeling relaxed, renewed, or improved? Overall, no. First of all, where did you get that file? Only industrial sandpaper is sold in that grade. It should not be used to file natural nails. Second, your fast, reckless, sawing gave me a skin burn — once. Third, a cuticle trimmer thing-​a-​ma-​jig is not a pecking device.
4) Was the price of service commensurate with the salon’s mission statement? They don’t have a website. Though I surmise their mantra is John Reuben’s — «Make Money Money».
5) How long did the $ 12 manicure last before chipping? 4 days.
Maybe you’re thinking, what do you want from a strip mall location and $ 12? 1) I entered without knowing the price. 2) I’d gladly pay double for a proper manicure in a clean, professional, relaxing setting that invited me to decompress if only for 30 minutes.