The Alley

The Legendary Heartbreak Alley… it has a life of its own. Since the early 90’s, it has given life to a town that needs all the livelyhood it can get. Sad will be the day the doors shutter, to party no more. In memory, many epic debauched nights were spent in this place. Yes, there is a distinct, palpable criminal element to a small subgroup of its patrons, and that is merely a historic part of its attraction. To complain mean you don’t belong, that you cannot relate to, or understand the «fly flashy just a little broke borderline tacky, but fuck you — I’m ballin» mentality of this crowd. You will not enjoy yourself here, if you haven’t embraced the inner rachet that lies within us all. What’s that, you say? The inner rachet is a cry from your soul that supercedes and defies race, age, gender, or class. It feels black, and hood and hip hop but its greater than that. The inner rachet is the insistence and determination to have a raucously and sometimes messy good time, dammit, because you deserve it and life is fvcking hard no matter who you are. So you turn the fvck up and bless the heart of any fool that decides to spoil the night. Only in The Alley, will you will see the true essence of who the Seven Cities are: the gritty post industrial desperado gangland chic of Newport News, the preppy collegiate chill and lazy Sunday vibe of Hampton, the ghetto fabulous street boldness of Portsmouth, the slick southern port city vintage swagger of Norfolk, the bohemian fun loving weed scented vibes of VA Beach kids, and the sweet neighborly charm of Chesapeake. All of that beauty in one place. You will see and hear it as an audio-​visual work of art melded into this scene, expressed thru unique dance styles, local fashion trends, regional dialects. You will be touched, talked to and smiled at (but only if you initiate and reciprocate) and treated like family in this place. Some of the most raw talented and creative people on the entire east coast gather here. I’ve seen lives changed (including my own but that’s another story), hearts broken, and lasting bonds made here. This is CGBG, our Tunnel, our Roxy and you should respect it. For many years, the Alley was all that side of the Peninsula had after the closing of the Mirage, 1851, Sugar Hill and other so called «hole in the walls» where people could chill after work and relax among family and friends. So locals are natually territorial and defensive about their patronage of it, and rightfully so. There have been more attempts to close this place down than missions to stop ISIS. Major celebrities come here when they want to party, be embraced and at home and never worry for their safety… ask Queen Latifah! The drinks are strong delicious and worth every cent, and the staff are trained to accommodate those who are patient and well mannered. Come with an open mind, room in your tummy for them WANGS and a bullshit free attitude and I promise you’ll have a great time. If something bad happens talk to the owners before the police and you’ll see that gets you a better resolution. You have to leave your issues at the door or you WILL get into some shit and it won’t be pretty. This is not Cheers, nor the bar to drown your sorrows. Norm and them are over at Power Plant or Harpoons and you should join em if that’s what you want. This place is for party people who like all subgenres of hip hop, r&b, and world music and they want to see and be seen while they twerk to it. And twerk they will, in the way only local girls do to a booming trap beat. Best believe, the spirit of the Alley is embedded in the city of Newport News, and the people of the city know how to party. We defined turn up long before the phrase existed. The Alley/​Bad News VA is the stuff that movies are made of and one should be honored to be a part of the scene where stars come and hide to be themselves. The acceptance is real and the crowd is very brown, beautiful and southern sexy. It’s an acquired taste, but take a sip you might like it! I believe it should be mandatory for newbies to the area to make a trip to the Alley so they can get a good tipsy understanding of the place they are now calling home. Also, ladies, do engage in bathroom chat in the mirror with clubgoers. The conversation in there ranges from comedy gold to theraputic, depending on the hour to drink ratio. 80% of the crowd knows each other from work, school, or play, so consider that a blessing and a warning all wrapped up in one. If you can’t tell from my tone, just know that The Alley is a part of my youth, my cultural experience as a native Virginian, as vital as my upbringing. The Alley is great, it is important and it is special. You must go. Y’all have fun now, hear?

This is definitely a local hood club. Plenty of parking, but if you’re not used to this scene, you’ll leave once you pull up. It’s free before 11 pm, $ 15 – 20 after 11pm. Drinks are strong, they have premium drinks at happy hour for an affordable price, dress code is lax depending on the night (sneakers & hats if you have on a collared shirt), but no white t’s. Club is split up into 2 areas, club on the right plays old school RB/​Hip Hop, also has plenty of tv’s playing sports, seating area and has more of an older crowd. Club on the left, has a bigger dancefloor & stage, plays more current RB/​Hip Hop and caters to the younger crowd and has food to order. Wings are good. Good DJ on both sides. You can also go back & forth between clubs so you experience both sides. Hope this review is a bit more up to date.

Pros:
Good music
The wings
Always packed
The wings
Has a sports bar
The wings
Cons:
Usually the scene of a crime of some sort.
Might see yellow tape that reads «police line do not cross» or «Caution»
Chicks that cannot handle their liquor
Dudes that do not brush their teeth b4 leaving home.

I can’t help but feel there are sooo many OLD reviews of the alley and none since the amazing remodeling, the reformed security measures, the new look, and feel, or anything. You’d think based off these old reviews that this place is a dump, but TRUST ME, its FAR from that. When you combine the elegance of miami, with a great local crowd, and a club thats more busy on wednesdays than ANY OTHER LOCAL CLUB is on saturday you get something great. There are lots of old folktales about the alley, but lets be honest. This club is packed out with the best looking people, and the best music every wednesday, friday, and saturday. I always wonder why soo many people HATE on this spot, but they are the ones at the door ready to go in multiple times a week.
The interior:
When you first walk in what you see is the usual entrance to any nightclub, but you’ll quickly notice two different sides you get access to! One side known as the Boom Boom Room, is where your dancers typically go. Its a younger crowd over there from about 21 – 30 I’d say typically where people dance the night away. It does get packed, and the music is BUMPING, and will quickly put you in the mood to dance even if you planned on being a wallflower. There are walls that change colors with the beat of the music all the way around, along with elaborate mirrors and such, several bars, a main dance floor, and 2 vip areas ! The lightshow is spectacular in itself, but all of the DJ’s are dope, and the crowd. VERY NICE to look at ! (not to mention this side is NON SMOKING)
The other side is the A-​Bar side and is the grown and sexy side. You can smoke over here and the mood is a bit more relaxed. there are wrap around couches, and TONS of HUGE HD tv’s that often play sports and other things of the sort. They host special events over here like the superbowl, and boxing matches etc. There is a dance floor, and on saturday this side packs up with the beat of Reggae other hits. DJ DC is typically over here and he gets the crowd going. There are pool tables over there, bars, and good FOOD !!!
the nights:
Wednesdays is without a doubt the local’s night. Its a different slightly more edgy crowd and tends to be a younger crowd. It gets VERY packed most nights, and the dress code is a little more relaxed.
friday is a slightly slower night where there are many birthday parties held, and $ 50 vip sections. Friday is more about the people and their night for celebrating in small groups. The crowd is still nice, but more relaxed.
Saturdays is LEGENDARY at this place. YOU’LL NEVER find a saturday that isnt packed unless a major artist is in town and even then its still busy. The house is filled by 1130 and doesnt end till 3am ! The eyecandy is ENDLESS. My fellahs and ladies will appreciate the view ! I saw a complaint about the free breakfast, but FIRST you should be happy you get anything FREE in this day and age. The breakfast isnt gourmet by any stretch, but its free, and often there’s potatoes, chicken, ham, sausage pork and turkey, eggs, biscuits, and or toast. Now complain if you want, but when you are sobering up and theres decent food, you dont complain. If you want more feel free to go wait in IHOP for hours after the alley lets out.
OVERALL:
There is a night for EVERYONE here. I noticed there were sooo many bad reviews, and I see some of yall had ruff nights, but I suspect there were other problems before you ever arrived. I would bet you’ve been back since you went and had a blast ! This place is AMAZING and you won’t find an experience like this anywhere else. I love this place.

Let me start off by saying that within the past year or so a female got assaulted at The Alley. Don’t believe me? Check the local news archives. It’s been closed once before because someone got shot there as well. I’m sure there’s plenty of other crimes committed here that I’m not aware. The Alley is one of those spots that you go when there is no other alternative. Free before 11? Yeah… if you get to the club at 9:45. Don’t expect to get there at 10:30, 10:45, or even 10:15. The line moves painfully slow, and for no reason. Yes, it’s a Saturday night and of course there’s going to be a line, but there is no reason it should take 45 minutes to get inside. It seems like they take extra long so that the majority of the people get in AFTER 11pm. The bouncers continuously bark at everyone to get in single file line as if everyone is in middle school again. If you ask any of them a question, they are VERY rude, and condescending. By the time you (finally) get to the door there’s usually one rude chick that checks ID and someone else to use a metal detector on you.
One side is for the more mellow, «older» crowd. There’s pool tables, and lounge areas. The dance floor is considerably small, and there’s normally not that many people dancing on it. They play mostly r&b music on this side. If you don’t mind all eyes on you on the dance floor it’s fine. The real club atmosphere is on the other side. Cue Lil Wayne, Nicki Minaj, and basically every other hip hop song on the radio. Everyone is packed in like sardines and it doesn’t differ from any other club. Lots of girating and booty poppin. The guys? Well, lets just say they aren’t gentlemen and most seem to be under 25. The drinks are watered down, and the cup size is laughable. If you can stand to stay after the club closes at 2, they serve a mediocre free breakfast, complete with dried out chicken wings and sausages.
If you are over the age of 30, this is not the spot for you.

I am going to write the review I wished I had seen before venturing to the Alley.
I got there at 10 PM on a Saturday and there was a bit of a line. There was not a cover charge but a mandatory coat check which costs $ 2.
There is also a dress coat but normal club attire will suffice.
There is two large rooms you can choose from when you first enter .
On the left, is the primary dance floor. The DJs played classic Hip Hop, new hip hop, Pop Hip Hop and R&B. Strictly hip hop only thought, no usual club music here.
There are several bars through out this room and several TVs that had sports on.
After 11 PM this room got very crowded and dancing room was minimal. The style of dancing ranged from head bopping to girating on the ground.
The second room had a dance floor as well but this room was fairly empty all night. The DJ here played more recent hip hop and when I first entered, there was a male dancer on the floor, dancing for money.
The bartenders on this side were nicer and had more of a selection (prob because the crowd was smaller).
The bathrooms were clean and the age of the crowd very from young to old.
Overall Im indifferent to this club but wished they would have played more of a variety of music.
Trust me when I say they only play hip hop.

Originally named Heartbreal Alley, this club holds many fond memories for me. The music is mostly hip hop but they usually make sure to slip in a few R&B and oldies in from time to time. The club is divided into two parts the main floor and ‘Wall Street’. When i went I always went to the wall street side because it usually was less populated and depending on the night had salsa, reggae or even live cover bands.
The local station 103 jamz has hosted ‘Wile out wednesdays’ here for years and is probably responsible for many people calling out on Thursday morning.
Unfortunately the crowd has gotten more prone to fighting over the years. Expect to see plenty of local big beautiful women there along with a lot of college kids.
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