Funtown Mountain

Funtown Mountain has been closed for a few weeks. The city has temporarily condemned the facility and it has cut off water and electric service. The owner is not even allowed on the premises by court order. Two large loans for F M are past due.

Made a stop here after visiting Dinosaur World hoping to play a game of mini golf. We didn’t have particularly high expectations. We walked into the souvenir shop to ask about the prices and the guy at the register kindly asked if we wanted to go and look at the mini golf before we paid for it. I’m glad he did. We walked up to the mini golf and it was super creepy and felt like we were in the beginning of a horror film about some kind of serial killer. The whole place felt pretty unsafe. The floor of the mini golf spot had a hole in it and we could see the floor below. I’m sure it would’ve been fine if we had stayed but a dark room with black light and lame mini golf was just not too interesting to us. We decided to head out and not play mini golf or do the haunted hotel.
The staff was nice enough. The attraction itself just feels pretty scary, unsafe, and rundown. I wouldn’t recommend making a stop here (unless you want a funny story to tell).

Funtown Review aka Our Wallyworld trip
My husband and I reside in Greenbrier, Tennessee… a little North of Nashville. Over the years we’ve taken the family to Mammoth for weekends of camping and exploring when they were young. So many times we’ve longingly viewed the Giant sign upon that mountain that entitled, «Guntown Mountain» & drive up to the first landing to walk around and wistfully wonder what it was like in its prime. See, we enjoy «cheesy» roadside attractions, mini amusement parks and such. We don’t need nothing fancy. We both grew up with Opryland as kids and as teenagers, worked there till they destroyed it with a big ass ugly mall. We GET nostalgia. We live for it. So when my husband stumbled upon the website and found that Russell had purchased it, was restoring it authentically and it was open, we immediately planned a weekend trip. We were due one. That’s what we do, weekend mini vacs generally a few hours or so away because that’s what we can afford in money and time. No, we didn’t plan an entire weekend to be spent on this one attraction but it was going to be the highlight of our trip. We both done our research before going, planning activities, where to stay, searching our food dives, etc… he directed me to the Funtown website and I linked to Facebook and read a few entries and then posted my own reply, and used that opportunity to even ask a few questions, which all went unanswered.
We enjoyed the gift shop, walked around giggling and happily taking photos and posing with the assorted figures and such. We browsed through the clothing rack for the Old Tymey Selfies and was planning what we’d wear, but there was a family keeping it busy and messy, so we walked over to ask the lady at the register about a few things before going up the mountain… and that’s when we found out, nope… not open. Hubs asked many assorted questions trying desperately to figure out how he’d got it so wrong, because as he asked her, don’t you guys have events up there even? And she said, yea… but we have to tram folks up for those and they are planned events.
We obviously were highly disappointed. The thing is, we consider ourselves fairly educated and we did our research beforehand. After a great deal of thought and going back to the website and FB, we realized that no where … Not one single place does it make sure to inform the viewer that the Mountain is actually closed and there isn’t a foreseeable date in the future posted that it will be open to the public.
I say all that to say this, it’s not fair to your costumers or potential customers, to not disclose. You don’t have to deter people from coming to visit your souvenir shop or the haunted house, but just make it transparent that is ALL that is open.
I didn’t want to write this. I wanted, like another person wrote, to really like this! I wanted to enjoy it. We never at any time fooled ourselves with great expectations and I am Not one of those people who come online and write a scathing review because of one small, insignificant wrong I think done to me. That’s not us at all. We just think to pretty basic to make it clear that it’s simply not ready and open yet. It’s unfair to us, just plain and simple.
With all that said, we will be back if you guys get it going. We appreciated the lady at the registers kind demeanor… while we were standing there checking out asking our questions, she let the answering machine pick up a call and there was a raging lunatic hollering about false advertisement, etc etc… she looked so over it, so done with having to take the brunt end of the complaints.
I hope you guys get it together and make it work. The idea is great. And thanks for the cheap rings and the deal you cut me on them.