Video 95

video 95… are you closed? why do you have odd signs on your windows? How can this be? where will I go for movie rentals for one dollar — so cheap I can rent anything… en– eee-​thing and not care. Hell, I could even get three of any olé thing and not care. Did Netflix do this to you? Am I to blame? Video 95, I remember your limited selection which forced me to dig deeper into my willingness to see crap, and I remember that sketchy doorway leading to pornland — I never did make it back there, and I remember when that customer came in to complain that the porno he got had the wrong film in the box — he didn’t want «one eyed vixens from venus», he wanted «one legged stewardesses do dallas» and the clerk had to call the boss and he couldn’t talk at a normal volume so he was yelling the titles of the movies loudly throughout the store over and over again and the customer seemed unconcerned… those were the days, 95 cent video, that I can never ever go back to.