Metro Trains

The worst metro trains system I ever used. Blank information displays at Heart and premium Southern Cross station. Trains are not on time and cancelled without notice regularly (to be honest it’s everyday). No wireless network reception within City Loop for 10 minutes.

Worst public transport ever!
Trains never on time or cancelled with no notice as well as the cherry on top when they terminate the train at random stops and basically give commuters no idea on what how to get home
Total rip off for the service we should only pay 50c a trip

«I love to hate, I love to hate you, I love to hate yooooouuuu»! I’m fairly sure that Erasure had Metro trains in mind when they wrote that tune (never mind that Metro wasn’t around in the 90s… Erasure must have been prescient).
I haven’t had a car since 2005 and in that time I’ve lived all over the world and depended almost solely on public transport. And I have to say, Melbourne’s sucks. At least it sucks for people who live in the western suburbs and are dependent on the infrequently arriving and frequently delayed stinky, 1980s era trains that service this deep, dark neck of the woods.
So: Trains come every 22 minutes on my line (bogus). Trains are delayed on an almost daily basis, usually due to rain, heat, bats, balloons, «signal faults», clouds, broken particle data transmitters, etc. Admittedly, these delays are in part due to an antiquated infrastructure and can be blamed partly on the state government who decided to privatise and under-​invest in public transport but I’m sure Metro is doing nothing to help this situation.
Also: Many, many stations (most in the west) lack an electronic arrivals board so one must push a button and wait for a robot voice to announce arrival times. Often you will push this button and will listen to a long serious of rings followed by a busy signal. Yes, they can’t even make the telephone work. In a city of 5 million in 2013 this is cray, cray.
Plus: Let’s talk about the price you pay for these fantastic services: 3.80 for a two hour trip in zone one and 5.90 to travel to zone two. I work in zone two and it costs me a whopping TWELVE DOLLARS a day to go to work. I’m not travelling no 12 kilometers either. I literally go four stops for a ride that lasts 15 minutes and I pay 6 bucks.
I could go on and on about this (because as I mentioned at the start of this review, I really do love to hate on Metro), but I won’t. Blood pressure needs to stay stable. Brain needs to stay sane. I will say, «A pox on you Metro, and a pox on your stinky Liberal government friends who refuse to fund public transport.»

I will keep this short.
I get that stuff happens, trains delayed, cancelled, stopped off at DJ’s for the mega home wares sale. Normal stuff.
But please Metro can you learn the art of COMMUNICATION !!!

Racing down the stairs at Parliament Station against the traffic at 7:30 on a Friday evening, I swiftly dodged the dawdlers and extracted my metcard out of my wallet whilst it was still in my pocket, a trick performed from years of experience. My passage stifled at the two-​way gate by more oncoming traffic, I hoped to the right and poked my metcard in just above the pixelated yellow arrow.
«Oh come on», I cried as the machine ingested my card, «Excuse me, there’s a problem here». The assistant came over and asked of the issue. «I’ve got two minutes to my train and this machine has just swallowed my bloody card». She waves her magic staff card and out pops a ticket, «It’s expired», she holds it up. «Well that’s not Mine, is it? I bought a Daily this morning, and that’s not it». She looks wisely quizzical at me and I humbly re-​search my wallet, this time while extracting the whole thing from my pocket. «A-​ha, oops, there it is».
«I didn’t see a thing» she smiles, and I thank her and walk through with a grin. My busyness has slowed, I’m in time for my train and I thank the level-​headed customer service assistant who probably deals with a hundred of me everyday.