Mayhem Paintball Games

I was leary of Mayhem — I’d heard some mixed things, but only later realised that not all of the paintballing places named Mayhem are actually run by the same guys. What a relief! This place is actually legit.
Having never been paintballing before, I don’t have much to compare it to, but overall there was little to be unhappy about. Whilst organisation occasionally felt shambolic at the beginning, that was more a reflection of how hard it is to herd stag do attendees and the like, rather than the marshals’ lack of organisation.
Marshals were friendly, clear and safety-​conscious. They were extremely clear about not taking off helmets at any time, and were reassuringly hard-​line about this. They were accommodating and helpful throughout.
The variety of scenarios was good — we didn’t even get to try all of them, even thoguh we were there the entire day.
Facilities besides the arenas aren’t the best, but then expectations are very low — it’s a paintballing outfit on a farm, so toilets of questionable quality was always going to be a risk. On the plus side, whilst I dreaded how bad the food would be, the burgers were actually edible and nobody got food poisoning, so I consider that a fairly high bar set.
Really easy to get to as you just take the Central line to Theydon Bois and then they send down a shuttle coach frequently. Couldn’t ask for it to be easier.
It also seemed to attract a good crowd; the regulars, at least, were all really nice/​helpful and didn’t do the kind of eye-​rolling and snorting at the rookies that you might expect.
All in all, it felt like what a good paintballing place should, at least to this first-​timer. I’m certainly intending to return.

Excellent day, £55 and that’s for 1000 paintballs and gun hire and overall hire aswell. Played 8 games and the teams are always even. Defiantly a superb idea for birthdays or stag do’s. Recommended! The staff are young and helpful and there’s hundreds of the buggers :)

Would you voluntarily get shot by a rapid fire machine gun at close range? The answer that any sound-​minded person would give to such a question would be Absolutely not, unless of course you like paintball. Paintball (and I’m sure the’t’ is silent) is surely the juncture at which BDSM and sport meet; not that I’d wear PVC on the field; too conspicuous. Not enough padding.
Mayhem is astonishingly easy to get to; unlike some of these fields tucked away in Kent, miles away from any form of public transport, this venue is on the central line. Just get off at Theydon Bois (it’s in East London, in case you wondered) and the shuttle which comes once every 10 minutes, literally dumping you at their doorstep. Their attitude to safety is suitably militant; you won’t get away with any rapid fire shots when no-​one is expecting it or off you go.
The ranges are very diverse; loads of woodlands, some trenches to get muddy in, a wild west saloon with not much coverage, which pretty much guarantees a good bruising. Fantastic. The food however is abysmal. Coke? Burgers? Fizzy rubbish? No fruit? Come on. At least spare me a banana
I went with a women’s extreme sports group called Adventure Dykes; what I was later to learn was that three of our team were in the army and the rest were regulars, which may go some way in explaining why we kicked our opponents’ butts. And that’s ultimately what’s so good about it. It’s all about the ‘I win, you die’ mentality. In the nicest possible way of course