The Famous Royal Oak

My local doesn’t get 5 stars because it is my local, I make it my local because this place is worthy of 5 stars! Not my closest pub, being situated down a very steep hill from the Broadway, but that keeps the clientele as local people even on a Saturday night when the rest of Muswell Hill gets invaded by the young and «trendy» of Barnet, Crouch End and Wood Green.
So why does it get 5 stars?
Firstly, it is a lovely little one storey detched building with seats all around outside. 3 TVs inside and 2 outside, but not for one moment do these seem an anachronism in a quaint old pub. They show sport all the time, but quietly in the background so it is never intrusive. They have a jukebox (9 songs for £2, so I often put a whole album on while I play pool). They have a pool table, you play under a winner stays on system (rightly so), but usually have it to yourself in the day. In the summer there is an IMMENSE BBQ, I had a Cumberland Roll, which is a hotdog made from huge real cumberland sausages, for £2.50, awesome value. I was stuffed.
They don’t do any other kind of food, but if they did, more people would come down from the broadway, and make this pub too busy, and less local, so for that reason it doesn’t lose its fifth star, it earns it.
Did I mention the Landlord is a lovely man, never seen him behind the bar, but he goes round smiling and laughing. There’s always someones dog outside with a bowl of water or bag of crisps.
This has everything you would write down if making a checklist for pubs… Except food, but we decided that was a good thing right?
The mathematics:
patio + relaxed atmos + juke box + pool + Sky + BBQ + a dog in the corner + lovely landlord always around = eight stars
Shame I can only give 5.

Really, really nice place, this one.
The first thing you notice when you walk in is actually what you’ve just walked past to get there. There’s a lovely outside wooden patio with tables and a BBQ on the weekends. It’s on a quiet road at the bottom of the hill so the road doesn’t dampen the atmosphere one bit as it’s so quiet.
Inside, there is plenty of room and a good pub feel about it rather than a commercial bar vibe which I hate. There’s an awesome juke box, which every place should have, in my opinion, and a well kept pool table right beolow the big flat screen which shows Sky Sports.
The only downer is that other than the BBQ, there’s no real food menu as such, other than the usual bar snacks.
So, here’s the math (s):
patio + relaxed atmos + juke box + pool + Sky — food = four stars

Lovely old boozer with an extremely friendly landlord. Monday is Samosa day, result! Sandwiches are regularly passed round during football matches. Unlike many other busy pubs there are always plenty of bar staff working and you never have to wait long to be served. An excellent pub quiz on Thursday nights which will tickle the smoothest of eggs. If England had made it to the Euro championships there would have been a big screen outside in the garden with a BBQ running alongside. Hopefully they’ll do it anyway! Great atmosphere here, one pub that certainly won’t be turning Gastro anytime soon.