Zephyr Hills Municipal Golf Course

This place is amazing! The workers are ready and willing to help! I love going here with my family! We have so much fun at this course!!!

So we bought a deal on Groupon (Am I allowed to say that on Unilocal?). A very cheap round of golf for four. I knew this was not the best course in the world, because they practically give away tee times on golfnow every day and I could see aerial views online. But the kids were out of school and it seemed like a good cheap place where a family of 4 would not disturb any serious golfers. I made a tee time and drove an hour into the middle of nowhere. No big deal, I knew where it was when i bought it.
What was a big deal was the nasty old geezer at the front desk when I arrived. At this time the course and combination proshop/​storage shed was empty. There was nobody in front of us and nobody behind us. As soon as I walk in, the old guy starts to interrogate me about how many people are playing and how we are going to use 1 golf cart. Now my 3 kids are under the age of 10 and we have played golf at various courses in the area. They use those little jr clubs that fit in the basket and all 3 of them easily fit across the seat. Now the old guy starts telling me that we can’t all use 1 cart and that he can’t let us play. I tell him that I just drove in from Tampa and I have this groupon. He says what’s that? I explain to him about electricity, personal computers, and finally the internet. I tell him that his course has sold 130 of these, surely he must have seen one. He says yeah but never like this with 3 kids. I tell him I need to speak with someone in charge and he tells me he does not know when the manager will be in. I tell him I am going to call groupon and inform them that the geezer here refuses to honor my groupon. As I start to dial my phone he says I better call Johnny!
I say, yeah call Johnny and then I ask him where the bathroom is (i’ve been in the car for an hour). As I walk down the hall to the the bathroom I pass windows that are literally boarded up. When I step into the bathroom there are two open showers. Each one has a hand printed sign taped to the wall that says «Don’t pee in the showers!». Apparently this is an issue at the zephyrhills municipal golf course. So I come out and Johnny is there. I know because it says «Johnny» on his uniform shirt. The old geezer says «there he is he wants to put all of these kids in a cart and play golf» And Johnny says sure why not. And the old geezer says but what would we do in the winter when the course is busy? Nobody, including johnny even dignifies his moronic inquiry with a response.
So we load into a cart and we head out to the first tee box. Well that might be an exaggeration Zephyrhills municpal does not so much use tee box’s as they use mounds of dirt and crabgrass. So we climbed the little crabgrass dirt mound and teed off. And you know what we had a little fun because we are a family and we enjoy each other’s company. But if we had any interest in actual golf whatsoever, we would have been miserable because we were treated so poorly and the course was such an unmaintained field of weeds, uncreative fairways, chunks of concrete foundations, dead palmettos, etc…
Did I mention it is on an airport runway? You think I am kidding? Look it up on google maps. In order to get to the 3^rd hole you must drive your golf cart over a dirt road which crosses the runway. Actually if you are an aviation enthusiast instead of a golfer you might enjoy the course. But if you have any remote interest in golf or being treated kindly or with respect, stay away from this garbage course and the mean old man at the proshop/​storage shed.
P. S. I was really tempted to pee in the shower but I didn’t.