Simple Pleasures Boutique

Surprised no-​one has rated Simple Pleasures yet. It’s simply a pleasure to be the first.
This establishment is what I imagine stepping into the Marquis de Sade’s dungeon would be like. Full of outfits that consist of a neon pink string, brassieres with room for the areola to receive oxygen… undulating rubber penis-​imitations, and contraptions that constrict the male genitals to look like plums. Heavenly.
I was not aware that the Marquis had an illicit drug habit, as there were many devices for one to smoke the «reefer». I suppose when one picks up a Tijuana prostitute and brings her to Saint Louis, one must fully embrace the lifestyle.
There were many fine cinema classics at this location. I was tempted to purchase «Backdoor Bonanza Volume 9» but regrettably they did not have it in Betamax. My wife «Biff» might have learned a thing or two from these ready and willing «honeys»!
Make haste when visiting Simple Pleasures, for the angry madam behind the counter does not appreciate true dash and romance — more of a «wham, bam, thank you ma’am»! I tried to leave her a copy of «Sensual Guitar» by Hernando on vinyl record, but she chased me away.
Hernando