Paradise Pizza

My work here is done.

CLOSED!
But guess what is going in here coming soon…
ANOTHER PIZZA PLACE.
Good lord, people. Haven’t you learned anything? Pizza does not work in this location! Makes me wanna scream FUCK!

If you’re looking for delicious independent pizza in Ballard, Paradise doesn’t live up to its name. Try Snoose Junction a mile down Market instead– you won’t be disappointed.

I had high hopes for this place after it took over Domino’s spot, but unfortunately these hopes were dashed.

This is not gourmet pizza. This is your BASIC pizza when you don’t need it to be fancy. Sometimes you just want a mediocre pizza (holy crap, did I just say that???) and if you didn’t hate Domino’s, you’d probably order from them. That’s it; you’re basically just in a pizza hut/domino’s/crappy chain pizza kind of mood. Maybe you don’t wanna spend over $ 20 plus tip for Pagliacci (Hell, you know you can’t resist the Pagliaccio salad — make that $ 25). Know what I mean?
All that being said (sigh), this place delivers. Crust, okay. Toppings, okay. Cheese, fine. Sauce, alright. A little light on the sauce. Whatever.
One really cool thing is everyone from the guy on the phone to the delivery dude… were SUPER friendly. Ever order a pizza and the guy on the phone is a PRICK? And you feel like you’re botherinig him? It was a nice CHANGE to get a sweetie on the phone. That made the mediocre pizza taste better.
Ya know, sometimes ordering really QUALITY, GOURMET pizza is just too tiring. You gotta get that ValPac coupon thing going. You could do worse than Paradise, dude.

I LOVE this little pizza place! Far far better than your average, average pizza! When I say average, I mean big chains, cardboard like dough, you know, what used to inhabit the building. The prices are fair, the carry out specials are great, and this guy Luke who works there is AWESOME! Seriously, he is the nicest guy ever, if we have to wait more than 5 minutes for our carryout (which is usually because we were early, not them being behind) he gives us a free 2 liter! Once he even gave us free hotwings! This isn’t the place to go if you’re craving ‘gourmet’ pizza, it’s not Zeeks, its not Pagliacci, but it IS pizza! Just plain ‘ol pizza! Always satisfying, always consistent. I really appreciate having a small buisness that I can support whatever food I’m craving, it’s so nice that Ballard is now home to this gem!
Try the apple dessert pizza, yum!

Warning: I’m going to go a little pizza science geek on this one.
Just as matter exists in multiple states, solid, liquid, gas, etc., so does pizza exist in three separate states: fresh, reheated and cold. I shall review this pizza chain in all three.
Fresh: I tried the philly cheesesteak pizza and was surprised to find that it actually did taste fairly close to a cheese steak. The toppings are moderate in amount, but this pizza is mostly dominated by cheese. This resembles eating a cheesy breadstick with onion, green pepper, mushroom and steak garnishes. It’s a pretty thin pizza and the crust is moderately flexible. The crust is not too hard in the fresh state.
Cold: Holds up rather well actually. A good low maintenance meal for those slightly hung-​over mornings where you’re trying to remember what you did last night and just aren’t up to cooking a seven course breakfast. Really, that could mean every morning for me.
Reheated: Sadly it suffers a bit in this regard. The cheese reheats rather well, but the crust is a bit hard the second time through. In pizza science terms, it lies somewhere between the malleability of tin and the tensile strength of tungsten.
Overall, this is a respectable, although not overwhelming pizza. Does ok on taste but a few extra toppings and a little more oomph to the dough wouldn’t hurt. Crust is an issue on reheating. They’re open 7 days a week from 11 am to 11 pm. Listed delivery range is Ballard/​West Woodland/​Sunset Hill/​Loyal Heights/​Whittler Heights. Prices range from $ 12.99 up to 20.99 for an XL.
Which brings up one rant: They give their specialty pizza sizes as M/​L/​XL. Where did the small go? It reminds me of the movie «This is Spinal Tap» where they have the amplifiers going up to 11. Just like how Paradise Pizza shifted the pizza sizes larger up to XL. Why not go with the conventional S/​M/​L and just make the large a little bigger? Is there some sort of Pizza International Standards Subcommittee (yes, tragic acronym) that quantifies and mandates pizza sizes?