Squat & Gobble

2.5 STARS
I wanted a bagel & lox, but I was too lazy to leave the house. Decided to order delivery on Saturday, February 13^th through DoorDash. I placed the order at 11:19am and it arrived around 12 noon.
Prices below are what I paid using DoorDash. Everything was priced higher than the menu I found online: Bagel +$ 0.75, Turkey Burger +$ 1, Toppings +$ 0.51 each, and Pappardelle +$ 1. Basically everything was priced 8% to 8.57% more except the burger toppings. Those were priced 51.52% higher. Overall, I spent $ 3.77 more than online menu prices, so it wasn’t too bad. I had a $ 5 off promo code.
*Bagel and Lox: Toasted Bagel Topped with Cream Cheese, Smoked Salmon, Capers, Red Onions & Tomatoes ($ 9.50)
*Turkey Burger: Seasoned with Herbs & Spices, Roasted Tomatoes, Green Leaf Lettuce, Grilled Red Onions, no Cranberry Aioli, no Grilled Focaccia Bun with Our ‘Famous’ Rosemary Garlic Potatoes ($ 12.95), add PepperJack (+$ 1.50), Sauteed Mushrooms (+$ 1.50)
*Chicken Pappardelle: Fresh Chicken Breast, Sautéed Broccoli, Garlic & Onion, Served in a Traditional Alfredo Sauce ($ 13.50)
The thing I wanted the most was the bagel. It was okay. The bagel wasn’t really toasty so it didn’t have that soft warm chew. I wish they had put the cream cheese on the side so I could toast the bagel a little more after it arrived. The pasta was alright. Creamy and rich. I wish there was more garlic flavor and less onion. There was a slight sweetness from the onions that I wanted cut into with some roast garlic. The pasta also came with what I assume is garlic bread. Though I didn’t taste much garlic flavor. The burger was awful! Overcooked, dry and rubbery. And it arrived looking like a giant mess. The potatoes were pretty good. I wish they gave us ketchup though.
Maybe I ordered the wrong things as I think most people like getting breakfast here. My selection of food was just eh.

Sooo, I am always hung over when I eat here for brunch so the last thing I want to do is squat and gobble, I rather say «Pass out and gobble» «Fall over and Gobble» because the meals here bring me from 0 to 100. Their service is sometimes not the fastest especially if you are upstairs, but they do their best for how busy they always are.
In terms of what to eat, if you want real asian food and perfect poached eggs, this is not the place, the eggs are either a hit or miss and sometimes the potatoes are burnt. Your safest bet is the crepes which are mostly vegetarian except like two of them. My go to is the chicken pesto (can’t go wrong) unless you are not human and hate pesto, JK, but that is the most filling! The dessert crepes are also a hit or miss, but can’t go wrong with ice cream! Maybe I will be adventurous the next time I go, but for now I am content with my crepes.
Thank you squat and gobble for reviving my hung over self, see you again for brunch!

2 stars only because the food was good. This was my first revisit after the remodel (so I haven’t been here for 3+ years). I came this past Saturday for breakfast.
1) Water was not served to us until we were halfway finished with our meal. My friend had ordered orange juice and that came at the very end. We both asked several times to several different waiters to serve us some kind of beverage but they kept putting it off like it wasn’t their job. A waitress even told us «I told your waiter that you guys need waters, this isn’t my floor». It takes 20 seconds to pour two waters and walk it to our table.
2) The prices have increased. By a lot. $ 12 for a simple breakfast meal.
In short, you’re better off going to the Raintree Café or Toast — which are both down the street (2 blocks walking distance). The food here is good but it’s just now worth my time to give them another chance.

Omg! A small piece of heaven is what it should be called. I love the service and the food is great. I come here for breakfast lunch and diner. I have almost had everything on the menu this is how much I come. Food is hot and flavorful. Wine is good but I have had better. Tea and coffee is alright but at least it’s hot! All in all it’s prefect for a quiet meaningful conversation

Atmosphere and service? Awesome. Food? Meh minus.

I am All about the flavor !! I love the Rosemary and garlic potatoes!!! The crab cakes florentine is my all time favorite meal here and the fresh squeezed orange juice sets it off!
This place can get busy during breakfast on the weekends. But the wait is not long at all.
The staff is sweet and the upstairs seating allows you to enjoy a large screen tv (usually sports) while you enjoy your meal.
Healthy choices and tasty soups and salads are available as well! I enjoy the Chicken Caesar Salad, and the French onion soup as well… Bön appetite !

I came here for brunch with my friend and daughter. It was a late Monday morning, so there was no wait. I really liked the employees because they were not only friendly, but funny! I forgot my keys there and they were quick to run out and return them to me before I even noticed. They also made a couple of witty jokes, and it was nice to have a chuckle along with our service! We ordered seafood linguini, blueberry pancakes, and a kids’ grilled cheese sandwich. Unfortunately, my pancakes didn’t get ordered, BUT they did comp us a side of one blueberry pancake, which made up for it. The blueberry pancake was good, but the best part of our meal was the French fries that came with my daughter’s grilled cheese! They sprinkled a little garlic on it. As for the seafood linguini, my friend said it started to have a sour aftertaste. I would like to return and try a few other menu items, though, like the eggs Benedict, dessert crepes, and Asian food. I’m not in the area much, but when I am, I will try to make another stop there!

Came by here to get brunch with some friends on a Saturday morning. First thing I noticed was the giant menu on the side that I had to crane my neck to read. Lots of options!
Finally I chose the grilled salmon sandwich and a side of fruit to be slightly healthy. My friends got an eggs benedict and a chicken pesto crêpe. The potatoes looked and tasted a bit burnt. We went to an upstairs table and noticed a bunch of small flies bothering us throughout our meal which was not fun and why it lost a star. The grilled salmon sandwich bread was more like a bun so I felt like it was a salmon burger. Food tasted average and nothing wowed us which is why I’m giving 3 stars. The service was fine.

My girlfriend and I came here for brunch a bit ‘hangry’ about a month ago and I’m still disappointed enough to write a review. The service was lackluster and the food seemed microwaved to high heaven. When walking to the restroom I saw one teenage boy working the entire kitchen. The table next to us complained as well and the busboy told them to come on Sundays for the better chef. That’s not how a restaurant should work. Worst meal I’ve ever had in the Bay Area. I give them two stars because it was a clean spot, so they have one thing going for them.

Tried the NorCal Omelette and it was fantastic! They impressed me with the avocado portions in this omelette.

Squat and Gobble has gotten worse over the years.
Came for breakfast one Saturday morning and my boyfriend and I ordered an omelette, eggs benedict, and a crêpe. Pretty basic considering they have Asian food in a very Americanized restaurant. Anyways, we went upstairs and got our food in a timely manner. Although it came out fast, both orders were wrong. (I sent mine back due to dietary reasons and obviously not being what I ordered but mostly due to dietary restrictions.) It wasn’t anything great which was pretty disappointing, considering our bill was almost 60 dollars with a tip. Very bland. Looked better than it tasted.
After waiting a while to finally get someones attention a women came up to us and asked if we were all done but we had been waiting on our crêpe. She said ok and left. After 10 minutes she came back and said «oh you want it now?» and took off again. It took her about 10 minutes to bring our crêpe out. Which wasn’t anything special either. Kinda frustrating especially because she was rude about it. We aren’t those kind of customers who tip poorly or give waiters attitude. We were extremely nice about it and she still managed to roll her eyes.
Minus three stars for the service, the wrong order and the mediocre food. Two stars for the old Squat and Gobble that was burnt down in the fire a while back. I don’t know what changed but they were a lot better. RIP to the original S&G

As I do not get to go to SF as much as I would like because I abore traffic, I have made it a vow that when I am there I will try something in the neighborhood I am in. We had a doctors appointment nearby, fairly early and when we finished, I was hungry. We decided to try squat & gooble because breakfast sounded good at the time.
It was walk up to order with a large menu on the wall. I was hungry so I decided to try the breakfast burrito and a fruity nutella crêpe. The breakfast burrito was pretty large, with two different sauces on it. The egg and chirzo filling with the avocado, onions and peppers was very good. It hit the spot, had good flavor and just enough spice for me so as not to be overwhelming. Combining that with the fruity nutella crêpe with all of its tang and sweetness from the fruits was a good combination. For me, I would have loved to have the nutella be more of a chocolate sauce but to each their own. My vanilla latte was good but as with most places, it had probably one too many pumps of vanilla for me and was quite sweet
My wife had the smoked salmon scramble and while I did not try it, she did say it was quite good and did have a good amount of the smoked salmon on top so I am sure she did not walk away hungry.
Our friend had the crab cakes florentine, she did say she enjoyed it quite well, but given because of health issues I cannot have a poached egg, I will have to take her word for it.
At the end of the day, we were all full, we enjoyed our meal and it came quickly which makes me happy when I am hungry for breakfast. I would try it again for a different time of the day if I were in the neighborhood but if I go back to the area in the morning, I would definitely hit it up again for breakfast

Excellent place to eat at, but be careful if you have a nut allergy, their Apple Pie granola crêpe has nuts. Wasn’t expecting to have nuts in it, not exclusive to the menu of ingredients, therefore nut allergy. Crêpe cravings was a total fail tonight.

Mediocrity is a good descriptor for the food at this local restaurant. The food is pricey at this self-​service’ style restaurant. Great for kids and families, but it was packed on a Saturday morning at 9:30… However, the wait was much longer at Toast, which undoubtedly has a better selection of tastier food options. I wasn’t a huge fan of the eggs Benedict, but the potatoes were delicious. I got them extra crispy and the Rosemary seasonings were great. They didn’t have Chai lattes.

Great place to grab a quick breakfast/​lunch with some friends.
When you first walk in, you notice a beautiful menu up on the chalkboard. It can be pretty overwhelming — with a ton of food options up there. I’ve tried several of their dishes, but my favorite would have to be their Chicken Pesto Crêpe & a side. (You can choose either a side salad, soup, fries, potatoes, or fruit).
You order, grab a number & go to a table. Pretty quick service, and the food is great. If I’m looking for food fast and don’t feel like waiting 1 hour+ on weekend for brunch — I’ll definitely be coming back here

So disappointing given how long it took them to reopen. Dining in is just so-​so and as it turns out take-​out is worse. Horribly long wait to get food. Waiting at the register for such a long time before anyone came to take my order didn’t help either. I know that the food is just average so I wasn’t expecting much, but the prices along with the wait times make this a one star place at best.
No apologies on being slow — they simply state «ok ready to take your order now». Will definitely pass on this place going forward.

2 stars for takeout, 3 stars for eating in.
We frequently visit friends who live near the West Portal neighborhood, so we’ve eaten at (and taken out from) many of the restaurants in the area.
Squat & Gobble has a fairly extensive menu, and my sense is that if you order crepes while eating there, it’s pretty good. Both their savory and their dessert crepes are tasty. I don’t think that crepes take out all that well, though, and the rest of their menu tastes like typical American chain restaurant fare. Their pastas are all okay at best, and their wok-​inspired menu seems right out of the Midwest (I’m shocked anyone thought this was a good idea in SF where we actually have Asian people.)

Came here for lunch one afternoon. Haven’t been here for a long time before the unfortunate fire that happened years ago. The remodel is nice and they have an upstairs (now?). It is very bright and airy inside and it makes it a nice place to have lunch on a sunny day (in my case, it was).
Me and a colleague shared a greek salad and Ruben sandwich. The salad was so refreshing and I loved the feta cheese. The sandwich was good but a bit greasy and mushy. Service was okay. I’ll have to come back to eat some crepes or more salad on a nice SF day.

Breakfast on a Sunday. Place was full, so after we’d ordered, we went upstairs to their expansion space.
Eggs Benedict is good, as were all their other breakfast entrees. Service was excellent.
We’ll be back.
Enjoy!

Squat and Gobble has been on West Portal for as long as I can remember. Even after the fire last year, they started rebuilding almost right away and were quickly back up and running! Squat is, of course, best known for their crepes — particularly their savory crepes!
The Chicken Pesto Crêpe is stuffed with roasted chicken, mozzarella, and sun-​dried tomatoes and packs a ton of flavor. Definitely one of my top picks here. If you’re looking for a salmon option, the Marina Crêpe packs a ton of flavor with the capers and olives!
I’ve had mixed reactions to some of their dessert crepes. You can’t go wrong with the strawberry nutella crêpe, but the Sweet as Apple Pie Crêpe was pretty disappointing. I envisioned pie a la mode in crêpe form with luscious warm apple pie filling and melty vanilla bean ice cream… but to my dismay the crêpe was dry and the apples could have been cooked longer. There was really no filling, just apples. And the granola on top ended up exacerbating the dry factor. The ice cream was the only saving grace.
The interior is spacious and clean and there’s plenty of seating with both upstairs and downstairs dining tables. The service is friendly and efficient at the register, but a little disorganized once you’re sitting down. I liked how they offered to bring out our dessert crêpe towards the end of our meal, but because this wasn’t communicated to fellow staff members, they tried to take our number away twice, succeeded, and then didn’t know where to bring our crêpe later. Overall, still a solid addition to the neighborhood, but the food is just average and I still prefer Crepevine. They have a diverse menu with salads, sandwiches, pastas, and even asian fusion dishes along with all the crepes though so at least you have options. Come here for a quick bite after work or before catching a movie at Empire down the street!

Crepevine knockoff that has potential among its hits and misses.
The West Portal location is simply decorated and modern, rebuilt after a devastating fire. You walk in and come upon a large menu board. The first thing you notice is that it borrows heavily from Crepevine’s menu board. The key difference is Crepevine’s is far enough that you can read it without much effort. The one at S&G is too close and the reading angle isn’t right. After a few minutes, I could feel my neck starting to ache.
Hits:
Service-​Friendly and attentive.
Bourbon Street Omelette-​Good flavor and portion. It could do with a bit more heat but the available Siracha and Tabasco helped.
Veggie Burger-​Good size, flavor, and texture. It had a pleasantly nice amount of heat.
French Fries-​Simple shoestring type. Please consider offering garlic fries.
Misses:
Pad Thai-​Call it what it really is… Chow Fun. It was very disappointing.
House Potatoes-Doesn’t come close to Crepevine’s or Original Pancake House. The pieces are too big and there isn’t much flavor.
Angus Chuck Burger-​So much potential but it was overlooked.

Great food! We had brunch! Loved the crepes (our dessert plates) and the omelette and crab cake Benedict were perfect!
Love my Benedict, the eggs were cooked great, running but not too runny! The crab cakes were fantastic!
My fried omelette she did bacon avocado and cheese. She liked it as well.
Her crêpe was good the fruity crêpe with bananas strawberries and blueberries and Nutella. I had the apple pie crêpe, it was pretty dry not very moist. The ice cream on the side was a helping aid in each bite.
The service, though you order yourself and sit down, they then deliver to you. Our waitress gave me a look when I went up and asked for a box, and she wouldn’t hand it to me, had to bring it to my table… The bus boy was nice got us water, we only left a small tip, hopefully he gets it.

I believe that squat and gobble is a decent place to grab a filling, but relatively cheap meal. It’s nice beacuse the menu is HUGE, so everyone in your group has a lot of options of what to eat.
When you walk in you’ll notice the huge chalkboard on the wall stating all the menu items. Love it because it’s always so beautifully drawn and o0ooo0 the pretty colors!!! The ambiance of the whole place is super nice, very spacious and well lit! The upstairs (finally had the chance to dine up there) is cool too, you get just as good of service as you get downstairs.
They have a ton of breakfast foods (benedicts, pancakes, waffles, omelettes, scrambles), but also a variety of savory and sweet crepes, salads, burgers, sandwiches, and some random asian dishes (mee goreng, curry, etc).
I’ve been to both here and crepevine (sister restaurants? they have the same menus pretty much haha) and my favorite thing is probably the chicken pesto crêpe. On my most recent trip to squat and gobble I ordered the crab cake florentine, which I was super excited about, but I was kinda disappointed! The crab cake had wayy too much garlic because that was the only thing I could taste, and the hollandaise was just A-​ok. The poached egg was perfect though! The crab cake florentine came with garlic rosemary potatoes (or actually, I think you can pick any of their sides!), which were sooo good!!! Loved the small crunchier pieces haha.
Idk about the benedicts, but i’ll probaly be sticking to the crepes haha. I definitely want to come back and try their omelettes because those look delicious!