Rhetorical Ragdolls

RHETORICAL RAGDOLLS REVIEW
I purchased a Ragdoll kitten from here within the last couple years. I love my kitty, she’s a joy for me. Here is my experience of my kitten in the first days of having her and now.
Pros: She is adorable with striking features of gemlike blue eyes and a soft coat. Some grooming and the occasional grody poopy butt, otherwise I can get away with brushing her once a week. Clean bill of health from my vet. She has good self grooming habits and good cat to cat etiquette. Her appetite is ferocious. She loves to play fetch with her toys and taught herself to fetch one night while I was idly watching tv and tossing her toy — she kept bringing it back! She sometimes follows me around the house. She sometimes side cuddles on the sofa or bed. She moves like a panda bear, flopping herself down on her side in the kitchen if she thinks I’m cooking something good. Lying on her back with her belly up. She chirps, and «hmphs» a short high pitched noise every time she lands from jumping. She’s playful and spry. Communicating with the seller/​owner was easy. Payment was easy. Picking up the kitten from breeder was easy.
Cons
When I first brought her home she was almost like a wild kitten in some ways. She was very hand shy and head shy and would duck my hands every time she saw them despite my gentle and slow movements. She hated to be held and still only tolerates it for 30 seconds at the most to this day. At first I thought she could be mildly feral, maybe not enough exposure to people. Or that the majority of her interaction with people consisted of them restraining her (for vaccines, baths, etc?). She has panic attacks if she thinks something might restrain her, with wild struggling and clawing to get away as if her life were in danger. This would happen even if something like the cat charmer, which is a long strip of soft felt, fell across the top of her body. She panics less now but will still immediately retreat in similar situations. As a kitten she struggled frantically to escape when I would hold her too long (more than 10 seconds).
I suspect that her breeding was acceptable but something about her upbringing was off. Her hand shy behavior pointed towards upbringing but I can only guess. It’s fine if she doesn’t want to be held for any length of time. I was very upset for awhile but I’ve accepted it after realizing I’d prefer a healthy kitten even if not characteristically ragdoll. But to be hand shy was unsettling. I love her and my home was always her forever home, I was not going to contact the breeder about «returning» her. But prospective customers should know ahead I had this experience with one kitten from here. I have other cats (two rescues from quincy animal shelter) and know other ragdolls who are not like this at all. I didn’t declaw her. It’s a steep cost for a certain type of cat, without the ragdoll personality of enjoying being held and cuddled. I would definitely go with a different breeder the next time if I got another ragdoll, one that raised the kittens underfoot in their own home.