Jungle Cruise

This ride is a 15 minute boat ride in a man made river with several animatronic animals, plants and breathtaking waterfalls. The whole ride through your tour guide is interacting with you, telling you really corny and pointless jokes, trying to be funny, but that’s what makes it fun.

This is a fun, slightly cheese ride that is still one of my favorites. I like the atmosphere created by the queue, as it does a great job of putting you in the right frame of mind. The ride is filled with somewhat dated animatronics, but to me that’s all part of the charm. A major factor in your experience is how good/​fun your guide is. I’ve had some that weren’t great, and some that were hilarious and really got into the role. Here’s hoping you get a good guide!

Lots and lots of puns. When my 3yr old starts to wince, you know they should probably turn the sound down a bit — it was almost louder than the fireworks.
Still, entertaining little ride around the man-​made river with animatronic animals and displays of people in the jungle. While it feels like there could be more, you’re really there for the story your guide tells and the puns they throw at you. Vintage, is what I think was right? For those of us who are new to it all, probably not as exciting as some of the newer rides.

So, this is a boat ride with corny jokes, but it’s FUN! It’s been a long time since I’ve rode it. The ride really depends on who the captain of the boat tour is. We were lucky & got a guy who really sold the ‘bad’ jokes. They updated the ride a few years ago & this is the first time I’ve experienced it. We visited the park a week before Christmas and they’ve decorated the boat cruise with Christmas themes & the jokes as well.
The boat seats a lot of people, which can help the line move fast. I got to sit right next to the captain, lucky me! It’s a ride that is fun for kids and adults alike. It’s not a thrilling ride, but fun. I wouldn’t wait more than 20 minutes for it, but that’s just my personal opinion.

OK so I used to love this ride as a kid. I totally get it that it is probably historically protected but oh my God do those fake animals look bad. There is no doubt that there has been very little upkeep on this ride. Too bad! It could definitely be retrofitted to be cool. Instead, the people who run the ride are instructed by Disney, I would imagine, to just pretend that you’re on a very cheesy ride because you are anyway. They assume you have already been on it and they act very tongue and cheek and tell jokes mostly. Jokes are even of how bad the animals look. They look so fake, it’s comical in a bad way.
It almost feels like the antiquated technology used will break down at any minute. Actually, on our jungle Cruise we did break down and it was about a 30 minute wait. Not that fun. If only they would do this with current technology. It would be really fantastic and not as cheesy and dumb as it is right now.
Surprisingly, the wait times are pretty long. I would absolutely suggest doing a different ride and investing your time somewhere else.

Pretty fun little river cruise, though be careful and don’t touch or fall into that disgusting water! It’s pretty much the same as the Disneyland Jungle Cruise ride. You get on a boat cruise with a ton of other people (they do pack people in tightly, so it’s slightly uncomfortable, especially on a hot day) and you ride through the «jungle» as your «tour guide» makes funny punny jokes. The jokes are pretty funny, if you have a deadpan sense of humor as I sometimes do. You get to see a lot of fake animatronic animals (and people). Their depiction of native people is a bit ignorant. I don’t know if Disney always tries to stay PC with its ride designs (certainly doesn’t see like it after I saw It’s a Small World and Jungle Cruise).
Thankfully there wasn’t much of a line when we were visiting (and we didn’t have a fast pass for it), but there can be a long line at times.
It’s not my favorite ride, so if we didn’t have some extra time, we likely would have skipped it.

This is another classic ride that i like to go on in either park, and this ride has a little something extra, compared to the Disneyland location.
Sometimes, the captain’s «jokes» don’t come off as good as others, but you’re in the Magic Kingdom! Presumably on vacation! So lighten up and just try to smile. It’ll put you in a better mood.

Okay. I’ll admit it, I’m a big fan of the Jungle Cruise attraction. But we all know that the skipper can make or break your ride. Fortunately, I have been so blessed to have amazing skippers! I might know all the jokes they tell like the back of my hand, but it doesn’t stop me from giggling or smiling. So, it’s a boat ride through different waters of the world. What I like about this Jungle Cruise compared to the one on the west coast is that this one has an indoor part. So awesome! Plus, I think that some of the setups look nicer. There is no height limit for this attraction, so everyone can enjoy it. It is a better attraction during the day, of corse, when you can see everything. At night, ehhh, not so much, but the queue is definitely shorter. Would I say go on this attraction? YES!!! What are you waiting for? Go… NOW! :D

Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you my 200^th Unilocal Review:
Those of you who know me (or have been reading my reviews regularly) may recall the struggle I had when it came to deciding what my 100^th Unilocal Review was to be. Well I am happy to report this one was a no brainer for me. Please, read on and enjoy.
This attraction is located in Adventureland, falls under the umbrella of «Classic Disney 101» and is easily my favorite ride in the Magic Kingdom. I apparently rode this as a 5 year old, but I don’t recall doing so. No memories stuck in my mind as did flying over London in Peter Pan’s Flight (see my review of that for said story). The exposure to this ride that really stuck with me was in 2009, during my «most amazingest birthday weekend on the planet ever» and on my actual birthday that year we park hopped throughout three of the four Disney parks. This ride was my final ride of that day and it has forever since been my number one ride at the Magic Kingdom, and I always take at least one ride per trip on the Jungle Cruise.
One of the original Disneyland attractions, this ride was duplicated at the Magic Kingdom. Board a boat, captained by a wise-​cracking skipper and take a 10min trip around exotic lands and animals (ok, animatronic animals are not all that exotic but it’s fun none the less). Nothing on this ride is all that frightening but it is all that fun. Go in expecting bad jokes, corny puns, and vintages animatronics, embrace what this ride is and you’ll have a great time. (For added fun, check out Weird Al’s song «Skipper Dan» before your next trip).
The Skippers are given some freedom when it comes to the script so no two rides are ever the same when it comes to jokes, punch lines, etc. though no matter what, be sure to have those cameras ready as you won’t want to miss out on getting a great picture of the back side of water. You’ll never forgive yourself if you missed out on that.

«Jungle Cruise sucks. Yo, Jungle Cruise is stupid.»
I heard a young man tell his friends this. This was after we had already ridden the Jungle Cruise, and I have to say, I agreed with him. We were running out of rides that I absolutely had to do, and I saw this had a long line and couldn’t really remember it from when I was a kid, so we grabbed a Fast Pass and got on. But yo, Jungle Cruise is stupid.
Your experience depends much on the boat captain. Ours was suitably cheesy and told a string of corny jokes as we had to wait to dock, so I liked that, but yo, Jungle Cruise sucks.