The Box

This is by far the worst establishment in the world!!! And I’ve been to some of the most exclusive including soho house and battery club. This place is nothing sort of amazing but yet having the worst people working for them. Let’s start with a bunch of assh**** working the door. Horrible miserable attitude and the best part was his fucking shitty comments. It’s not even worth it… don’t even come here there’s sooooo many other better places for a good time! With better looking crowd than this shit show and their overpriced drinks…*mic dropped*

The door man was one of the unfriendliest, most incompetent humans we’d ever met. We were patrons waiting to spend money at the establishment and we were treated like convicted criminals. Once we got in, we enjoyed nothing but thorough disappointment, and left soon after. Don’t believe the hype, this place is kitschier than an Old Navy commercial. Honestly, a true waste of time.

Would love to write a review about the inside and my experience. However going with 4 girls and 4 guys we had no chance getting in unless we spent 5k on bottle service/​table. I told the doorman I would do it for 3k… he ignored me. So we went next door to drink. I hope to update this one day but, that was our experience

Insanely Awesome! A one of a kind experience you won’t find anywhere else. Definitely not for the squeamish or conservative…
Every time I’ve been the shows are different but each time I find myself thinking «WHAT’S HAPPENING» (in a good way of course)!
The place itself is small so you have a good view of the show regardless of where you are. On the pricier side with drinks at $ 20 a pop and very hard to get into unless you know someone.
Add it to your bucket list for sure!

Very cool vibe and great music (Dj Brooklyn Dawn). Loved it.
Had no trouble getting in, experienced some of the weirdest shit haha. The bartenders were rude though.

The Box… hmm, where do I start.
First of all, The Box is not «Club» and to say so would be a disservice to the place and to it’s patrons as well. Nor is it a restaurant or cocktail lounge. But rather, it’s a combination of burlesque, cabaret, circus/​carnival acts, along with dance music, cocktails and food.
I include the term «circus/​carnival acts» because I think that’s what disturbs people the most and creates such negative reviews… not to mention the velvet rope/​door person, which truly is one of the hardest to get through in the city. Mainly because, like I said, it’s not a club, so they don’t care about having lots of girls or having promoters work the club or selling bottle service.
You really do need reservations for a table or need to know someone there. The owners of the club, Simon Hammerstein and the other partial owners, have made it known they don’t want this to turn into a Vegas-​style club, but rather a theater of Vaudeville acts.
So, back to the «Acts»…a few of them are pretty tame and mundane — burlesque dancers, female impersonator singers, raunchy comedians, etc., but a few are, well, hard to explain, and frankly grotesque to some. I personally found it amusing, but others at my table couldn’t watch, and one of the girls actually left and went home cause she couldn’t handle it, haha.
To give you some perspective, and only to prepare those who are coming who have never been, one of the more regular and popular «entertainers» here is Miss Rose Wood, a transgender performer known to push the boundaries of her performances in order to shock audiences. And she did that well the night we were there.
The gist of her act was, she was rolled out while sitting on a toilet completely naked, then stood up, reached down into the toilet and grabbed either fake or real poop and then proceeded to smear it all over her genitals, body, face and hair. Was so realistic and shocking, that one of the girls at our table almost threw up and left. Miss Rose Wood is also famous for vomiting on Susan Sarandon (google it) who was sitting in front of the stage, along with many other disturbing acts, just to give you some perspective.
Anyway, the reason I point this out is, if you plan on spending $ 1,500 for a table there, or if you plan to eat while you’re there, be aware that some of the acts will be along these lines. Like I said, it didn’t bother me, cause I knew these kinds of things were coming, but for others, they couldn’t handle it.
So, My Advice is:
1. Make reservations
2. Go during the week, when it’s less crowded
3. Don’t get there until 11pm as the show starts late
4. Get a table with a group of friends so you have somewhere to sit
5. Request a table in the back/​sides so you don’t get hit with bodily fluids from the performers
6. Don’t take pictures of the show as they’ll grab your phone/​camera
7. Don’t eat while you’re there, you’ll regret it
8. Drink A LOT so you can handle the show
9. Have Fun… if you can, haha
10. Shower when you get home, you’ll want or need to lol
Overall though, I gave The Box 3-​stars as we came prepared and we had a lot of fun there. But it’s hard for me to give it a higher rating, as one person from our group left, and there really isn’t much room to dance as it’s so small, the door is a hassle, it’s not cheap, and the acts are pretty good, but not great.
So, if you’re not able to get in here, don’t worry, you’re not missing much, but if you do get the opportunity to go to The Box, you should most definitely go, just to see what all the hype is about. Just remember, that hype will most likely include a few disturbing acts, haha.

Strangest show I’ve ever been to. Definitely a great experience if you have the opportunity to go. Everyone in there is dressed more upscale, and there is a heavy smoke smell. There are 2 floors, both with great views of the stage. I was at the balcony at the top and was able to enjoy the show from there. Every single table was full and I had to squeeze through to get by because there were so many people on a Saturday night. I arrived around 1am and the show didn’t start till about 2:15am there was a 30 or 40 minute intermission and the show was still going on past 4am.

Bouncer is 5′ nothing and has a major Napoleon complex. Unless you’re willing to suck his methaphorical dck to make him feel good about himself, don’t bother. We managed to get in as girls, but not without his unnecessary attitude. Drinks are insanely expensive, which is fine, but the experience feels cheap and desperate when the bartender circles the 20% suggested gratuity on the receipt. Show is interesting but not worth the drama if you’re not absolutely DYING to see a freak show /​something different in NYC.

I’m not exactly sure what I witnessed, but I enjoyed it! The performance art was interesting and definitely not for the conservative. The music was great and I was able to get a few good dance moves in. I expected more in terms of décor and atmosphere and space to move around… I’ll get over it. I didn’t have any issues at the door, but I knew someone who walked me past the rope.
All in all? It’s a once in a lifetime party. Should you feel bad if you can’t get in? Nah. Just watch «two girls one cup» right after «Marie Antoinette» and you’ll get the basic idea.
It’ll save you a shit ton of money.

This place got progressively worse as the night went on. By 2 am the room was filled with cigarette smoke. Bad surprise! The performance art was truly bizarre, I shudder to share the details. It was so gross I think everyone should go here just to experience it. Bring a mask to filter out the smoke & conceal your identity. This place is one of NYC’s most bizarre nightclubs. Zero stars for the smoking. Five stars for the authentic weirdness.

I was wearing cavalli and like most new yorkers, work about say 16 hours a day, so when one wants go out old school stylish, why can one not get into a place. for just being too sweet and awesome?
i was told it was because i am white.
my boyfriend’s british accent did not help this contrived napoleonic complexed animosity.

This place is simply terrible in so many ways.
The Show: Now, I sat in the front row of the stage and the last act is literally this tranny taking a shit on stage for like 5 minutes. I am not exaggerating. This «performer» took a giant poop like ten feet away from my face and then smeared it all over himself. There was even poop left on the stage floor (which people then proceeded to dance over after the performance ended). And when he was finally done taking a giant shit, they led him off stage straight past me covered in shit. It was seriously one of the least pleasant experiences of my life. I had to cower behind my date because I was afraid the performer would like reach out and smear some on me because this place is unpredictable and disrespectful of its patrons.
You Might Get a Disease: I honestly think they need to be shut down for health concerns. Besides this poop incident, there have been other times when people ejaculate on to the audience and spray all types of bodily fluids. I seriously think that you should not sit in the front unless you are comfortable possibly catching some gross std from its twisted performers. And if you aren’t in the first few rows you can’t see anything at all anyway. So take your pick.
It’s true that the bouncers are COMPLETE assholes, even to me, who is a super attractive female who gets in everywhere, and even then, the only reason I got in was because my date knew the owner.
Anyways, this is not the type of night out you want. There were a few cool performers that did crazy unexpected shit, like twirl around on roller skates while spinning his partner around him just by her feet, and then by her head.
Overall, this is an establishment that has no respect for its patrons and relies on shock value for entertainment. This is literally the club equivalent of a couple that has terrible sex but does tons of taboo shit to make themselves feel avant garde.

Wish zero stars was an option. Have never been treated worse than my group was here. The «owner» and doormen at this place are horrible. It was my birthday and our group agreed to pay $ 1,000 to just walk in the door but was then screamed at saying we were no longer welcome there because we didn’t know the exact number of people with us off hand and had to pause to count them. I told them it was my birthday and to please treat their customers with respect and got the response of «I don’t give a fck and you should leave.»

Thanksgiving weekend:
Hopped out of the taxi, walked to the front of the line, bouncers and I exchanged a couple hushed words and within seconds, I effortlessly bypassed the countless poor unfortunate souls glaring at me on that beautiful Saturday evening. It’s nice to know people.
However, it’s not so nice when these people continue to run a complete hole in the wall. Coming from a person who, unlike many of the sour reviewers below, was not rejected at the door, I still don’t quite like this place Sure it’s «cool» if you’re someone who knows someone but do you need attention that bad? Lol, let’s hope not. The owner is shitty; from the pretentious way which he carries himself, his bad taste in men, down to his cheap shoes. Unfortunately, his staff has started acting just like him; rather than bubbly bottle girls who should help you enjoy your night, they act like money hungry escorts who have no problem walking around with stank faces.
When I first got there, I had the VIP table second from the front on the left. I didn’t like it because we were a large party so we asked to be moved. Being the only group with a billionaire present (yes, I said right) I am sure it should not have even been a question WHY we wanted to move the table. but I was asked by a bottle girl because again, that is the attitude of the staff. Not cool. Again, you’re here to accommodate us, darling. do as we ask and we will gladly pay you. well. What you don’t do is ask us dumb questions like, «Why do you want to move your table?» Umm because I don’t like it. And because I said so!
Negatives: (hasn’t this whole review been pretty negative thus far?)
– Kept having to ask bouncers to remove drunk girls from my section.
– Staff member asked if it was ok if Dave Chapelle sat with my party. Really? Im asking for everyone around me to be removed. and you really think I want to add him… Why? Get out of my face.
– I kept tripping over this shitty old rug underneath the couch and table.
Positives:
– I was allowed to smoke cigarettes inside.
– I was able to use the employee stairwell to access the bathroom.
–kitchen staff kept feeding me little snacks every time I went «below.» It was very kind– I appreciate them very much.
–kitchen was spotless and very clean!
–chocolate covered strawberries are bomb
I honestly have mixed feelings for this place. I wish it were owned by different people and they didn’t allow such douchebags with hipster haircuts inside. No one wants to hear about how you’re trying to be a model– I live in LA, I hear enough about that, trust me. It’s not a good look.
Oh! The kitchen crew cooking the food downstairs, they deserve to be tipped better. They are real sweet people who make amazing food, especially hot fries and sauce. I mingled with them for a little when upstairs got too boring and I drew weary of seeing too much trans-​gendered penis (not my idea of burlesque) on stage.
Overall, The Box seems like a wacky, Moulin Rouge themed madhouse where performances are Coney Island worthy and attitudes of wait staff are quite fitting of New York. Beware when selecting the front VIP (long center-​stage facing) couch on the floor. If you don’t trip on the carpet while dancing, you may likely be spritzed from a performers ass or vag secretion by nights end… Unless you’re into that kind of thing. yasssss

THIS PLACE IS CRAZY
But crazy in an awesome way
I spent four nights in NY and came here one of them. That night was my favorite night. I thought I had seen raunchy and sexual performances in San Francisco but I was so, so wrong. They take it to a whole next level here at The Box. I mean if you know you’re not into those types of shows I wouldn’t really recommend coming here, but it was super fun even though it was also pretty shocking as I didn’t know what I was getting my self into. There are also side dancers who roam around the general floor area. They seem to hide in corners and kind of slink around the room floors like sloths dressed in various costumes. There was also a woman dancing in a hoop above the bar, and I’m sure they have other surprises I didn’t see since I was just here the one time.
We sat in the balcony table area upstairs because we happened to have a friend here. I would recommend trying to get one of these tables because you won’t get hit on by the many creepers downstairs and you still have a great view of the shows.
Drinks are def pricey here, but maybe just pre-​game and try to enjoy their crazy entertainment!

Not nearly as exciting as everyone made it out to be. Drinks are way overpriced. $ 19 for a vodka/​soda? Give me a break. You’re not that special.

If you have a chance to go, you should, if you can’t get in don’t get too torn up.
The box is both very cool in many respects, and rather tedious in others. A friend and and I got in with our other friend who’s more in the scene.
The good was that the acts (burlesque/​cabaret) we saw were hilarious, sexy and and just edgy enough. There was a contortionist who couldn’t have been anything less than world class.
The tedious bit is all the forced and arbitrary exclusivity. There were people paying thousands to sit at VIP tables who never turned to watch the show,

Two beautiful girls– denied at the door.
Ok. Cool I guess. We arrived at 11:15PM and were smacked with major attitude from the bouncer drinking his Starbucks coffee.

Dirty in the bad way. I wouldn’t sit down here. If you’re charging exorbitant prices for table service, how about taking a little of that and fixing the rips and holes in the seats?
The «exclusive» upstairs area is disgusting — sticky splatters on the walls & ceiling. Dirty glasses. Shoddy sound system. Empty light bulb sockets. Even the disco ball is scotch taped together.
What IS it with clubs in this area that present themselves as extravagantly classy and are not? As fun as live burlesques is, The Box goes out of its way to make sure the experience is not worth the effort.

I think what this place has turned into is another club with a Studio 54 Vibe at the door and the vibe continues on the inside after midnight or so. This was my second time being there, and all I can say is each and every main show on the stage was different each time I went.
This is like walking into a David Lynch film and witnessing an American horror story freak show, show. So, of course I LOVED the vibe. It’s out of this world. Think David Bowie, meets Elton John (before Disney) Meets David Lynch ALA Twin Peaks, meets Studio 54.
My friend made a joke about how our drinks /​bottle ONLY came to about $ 1, 400.00 but I was not sure if he was serious. He was actually acting like it was a good deal, being a private kind of club scene and all and there, right next to us was Mr. Wolves of Wallstreet. For his privacy, I won’t mention his name, but let’s just say that he was laughing and having the best time, right along with everyone else. You have to go in with an open mind, and expect NOTHING. This way, everything you see, will be a huge surprise, because each night is completely different.
I love Cirque performers and the shows they put on, and this place was a jaw dropping… Beautiful bends and twists. There are a few acts where you will hear yourself saying aloud…“OH MY GERD!!! did they just do THAT?”? Yes, it’s that kind of place. So of course, I was right in heaven.
I’m not going to give away spoilers of the great performers I saw, the beautiful fun costumes or even how the vibe in this place feels like you would see the owner Steve from Studio 54 peeking out over the DJ booth (I’ve heard from older friends that, that’s what he used to do. Just smile down upon his ‘Party’.)
So Go. Just Goooooooooooooooo and don’t look back. You’re life will never be the same and think of all the stories you can tell your friends about this place and the things you saw, and think of all the stories you will be able to tell your grandchildren.
I do suggest NOT dressing like a frumpy sow.
Ladies, class it up a bit and wear some make-​up and maybe some heels and do your hair. Don’t expect to be allowed in wearing your yoga pants, your Birkenstock’s combined with the infamous NYC faux Pas «Sex and the City ‘scrunchie’ …that Burger wrote about, in an episode of that show.
No no no no. Also do not expect to be let into a night club wearing a t-​shirt and low to your knees baggy ass jeans. I’m sorry, but the nights I was there, NO ONE was wearing t-​shirts, jeans or hats. The crowd was from every walk of life and all races, but they were dressed as if they actually spent some time choosing an outfit to go out on the town. Hair and clothing represented a ‘night on the town’.
Because of the high demand to get into this club– the owner has a right to be selective about who he lets in. There’s no excuse for butt-​head behavior at the front door, but some people just can not take the word ‘NO’ for an answer. What they should do– is simply say «I’m sorry but we’re all booked for this evening» not ‘get lost’ with the hand gesture to shoo away. That’s just rude. Even at 54 there were no verbal insults at the rope, because I know of so many older people who actually went to Studio 54 (not just saw the movie like myself) and they said a simple shake of the head no, with eye contact was all that was needed. Then one was ignored. There’s no place for verbal abuse and degradation. It’s just not good for the soul.
However, that being said, if you pay for a bottle and a table, there should be no attitude with you at the door. Everyone IS the same, but that does not mean one can show up looking like a slob or some baggy jeaned, boxers hanging out hip hop hooray hooligan. Dress nice and dress classy. That’s all this club probably wants. Inside is where the sloppy begins, not outside in front of the door.
Just GO! You won’t regret it.