Lincoln Firefighter’s Reception Hall

WEA YOU STAY GOING?
Wen people learn dat you stay going mainland fo’ vacay, dey usually respond with beeg smiles, wide eyes, and enthusiastically ask, «Where are you going?» or «What state are you visiting?»
When I replied back with, «Lincoln, Nebraska,» I got da reply, «What’s over there?»
Post-​visit, I can honestly say wat stay ovah dea: «Haoles, corn, and choke land.»
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SCCA SOLO II NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP RUNOFFS
I was dea attending da 50^th Annual Sports Car Club of America (SCCA) Solo II National Championship Runoffs sponsored by online discount tire/​wheel magnate, Tire Rack, and held in September 2013.
No, I don’t race, but my husband does!
And befoa any of you get any kine preconceived notions of a spiky-​haired, skinny and lanky Japanee/​Korean/​Chinee who binges on Fast & Da Furious movies, Initial D manga, and Top Gear (da Europe version; U.S. one sucks monkey butt), who illegally races on da H-​2 and H-​3 freeway in da middle of da nite, and goes to Tantalus fo’ midnite drift runs … YOU’RE ACTUALLY RIGHT!
NOT!
He’s a «fluffy», dark Hawaiian dude dat I affectionately call «Da Fat & Da Furious» (based on comedian Gabriel Iglesias’ hilarious joke) who has done autocrossing fo’ ovah a decade now.
WHAT AUTOCROSSING (OR «AUTOX») IS …
A timed competition wea cars race, one at a time, on a defined course, and da goal is fo’ have da fastest time. It’s a sport dat requires speed, but mo’ so, you need fo’ have precision and expertise behind da wheel.
WHAT AUTOX IS ***NOT*** …
— Illegal road racing
— Drifting
— Crap you see in movies like da Fast & Da Furious
FOR MO’ INFO …
If you’re interested in mo’ detail, go check ‘um out, go check ‘um, go check ‘um:
Website:
Facebook:
BACK TO DA RECEPTION HALL
Anywhoooo, wat brought us to «Podunkville» was dis competition + da hall was used as da site of da welcome reception/​banquet. It was spacious, clean, and capable of holding large parties up to 300 people. A parking lot dat holds up to 90 cars and no pukas!!! (puka = «hole» in Hawaiian; if you live in Hawai’i, especially on O’ahu, majority of our roads and highways look like da equivalent of Swiss cheese). Has a large commercial kitchen or you can bring your own catering/​food. Very impressive and located rite across from da Museum of American Speed dat has several HUMANGOUS floors of race cars, engines, items related to speed (push carts, bikes, etc.), car-​related merchandise (lunch boxes, toys, etc.), antiques, and mo’!
I guess with all da land in Corntown, U.S.A. dey can afford fo’ have such a spacious and huge facility … lucky buggahs!
REVIEW #256

Beware! If you have any unruly guests, the staff will close the place down, and kick everyone out without warning or recourse. Very unprofessional in my opinion.