The UPS Store

I’ve used them twice — one good experience, one terrible. A coin toss. First time, they packed a birthday present and shipped it normally. Arrived when promised and in good condition. Thumb’s up.
Now the bad one. I dropped my passport off at this UPS Store Monday morning. «Guaranteed delivery» at 10:30 in Washington Tuesday, they tell me, for $ 38. Paid with a credit card so I have a record.
At 09:30 on Wednesday I’m back at the UPS Store, where I ask for a «partial» refund (i.e., I’ll pay «routine» delivery, but not for the «next day air» «guaranteed»), because the package hasn’t been delivered yet. This is an IMPORTANT package to me. I show the UPS tracking info to a young lady there, a brunette, who hands me a photocopied (more later) map to the UPS hub over on Clyde Park Avenue, about 15 minutes away by car. She tells me that because UPS is the «carrier,» they’re the ones that have to process the refund. I said, «Wait a minute, aren’t you UPS?» She said no, they’re a wholly independent company and they simply provide retail. I said, «C’mon, you’re a franchisee, you can’t wear that UPS symbol on your shirt if you’re not.» She said nope, and once the package left their shop they have nothing to do with it.
Something smelled, so I grabbed a business card (with owner Rusty Williams’ name on it) as she headed to the back another customer. I waited until she came back and asked her what her name was. She said, «Callie.» (I’m not sure of the spelling, but I wrote it down in front of another customer, and headed out the door.)
Time passes, miles fly by. I’m at the UPS «hub» over on Clyde Park Ave., and I relate the story to a customer rep there, and show her the package’s late itinerary. She says, «Well, you have to claim the refund from the UPS Store.» I repeated what «Callie» had told me, and showed her the map that «Callie» gave me. The service rep says, «I wish they wouldn’t keep sending people over here — they’re supposed to handle these things there.» I told her that the UPS Store had a whole box of these maps that they apparently hand to customers — she looked at me, puzzled.
Then she said, let me call the 800 number for UPS to straighten this out. Maybe they can process the refund. Her colleague, another nice lady, told me that the UPS Store is supposed to refund the money and then claim that amount from UPS (more later). Now on the phone with UPS at the UPS hub, there’s confusion — the guy at the other end thinks I’m the receiver. I’m not. So he transfers me to a robot. And after I tell the robot the tracking code, it tells me that I have to go to the UPS Store for a refund. Oh, and by the way, the package has just been delivered. It’s 10:22. It’s exactly 23 hours and 57 minutes late, past its delivery «guarantee.»
The UPS hub rep tells me, on my way out, that I can avoid all this nonsense by coming directly to the UPS hub or, I can even call UPS and they’ll pick up my next package at my house. Sounds reasonable. Next time.
Time passes, miles fly by. I’m back at the UPS Store. Now there’s a young man at the desk, and I explain my predicament once again (3^rd time). I include the fact that «Callie» gave me the map and sent me out to the UPS hub, and I’m now back to get my refund, per the UPS hub’s information, and the UPS 1 – 800 robot. «OK,» he says, «we’re going to get this straightened out, like it should have been when you first came here this morning.» There’s one thing, though. «We don’t have anyone named „Callie“ here,» he says. I said, are you sure … a young woman, brunette? «We have a brunette here, but her name’s not «Callie.»
«Really? What is it?» I ask. «It’s Edina,» he says. OK, I think, it’s 3 syllables and sounds nothing like «Callie.» How did I miss that?
So I think he’s just going to process the refund. Nope, he has to make a phone call first. About then, «Callie» walks out where I can see her. I asked her what her name was. She says, «Edina.» I asked her why she told me her name was «Callie.» «I’m sure I didn’t say that,» she says.
Now Paul (I learned his name just before leaving) calls UPS. it takes a few minutes and there’s lots of writing, but it’s clear he’s told that they (the UPS Store) have to process a refund. «OK,» I said, «do you need my credit card?» Nope. Paul says he has to make one more call first. I can hear this end, too. He tells the other person that «we have to process a refund» for a late delivery. More writing as he listens to the other person.
He comes back to the desk and says they’ll send a check to me after 10 business days. WHAT? Yeah, he says, we have to file a claim with UPS, then we refund to you after we receive it. «By check?» I ask. «That’s kind of 20^th century.» He chuckles. I’m sure his second call was to Rusty, the owner. Who claims that he’s not a UPS franchisee, and he doesn’t have to refund anything to a customer until he receives his claim first. Plain Wrong.