G Acupressure Center

This was by far the worst massage I have ever experienced.
If I could give this a Negative 5 Stars I would
I travel a lot and I get massages most every week I travel and have had them all over the world in many cities and many different countries, so I know a good and bad massage. So here is my story of the worst massage ever.
I got to the location and it was in a strip office center, and it was very dark, cluttered and dirty in the business. Mary greeted me very pleasantly and did not speak much English. She took me in the massage room and just left, so I had no idea if she wanted me to get ready or what. About 5 min later she comes in and was surprised I was not undressed and ready. So with hand motions not verbal she told me to undress and lay face down on the table.
The Massage started out OK for the first min but it was soon apparent that Mary had no real clue on how to give a massage. She was very spotty with her massage and never really got into a rhythm that you find with a professional masseuse. About 5 mins in her phone started ringing in vibrate mode on the table. So I was already not relaxing from the bad massage now her phone is about to vibrate off the table. So on about the 5^th time the phone rang in 2 min she decides to pick up the phone and proceeds to rub my back very half assed with one hand while talking on the phone in her native language. During the course of the 1.5 hour massage she answered the phone a total of 4 times. And the phone was vibrating for most of the massage.
While she was rubbing my shoulders she was so hungry I could hear her stomach growling very loud in my ear, which I could hear her stomach when standing across the room but now with her stomach right close to my ear it was so loud I could not relax at all.
OK so add insult to injury she was rubbing my leg she decided to sit in a chair as she did it and she fell asleep during the rub. So I shook my leg and she woke up and started again. She feel asleep again about 10 seconds later so I shook my leg again, and she started. I was so baffled and amused by this I decided to just see how long she would do this. I did the fall asleep thing about 10 to 20 times for about 15 min or so. I finally got tired of the game so I asked her if she was OK and she jumped and said «o are you tired do you want to just go to sleep and rest you can» LOL.
So near the end she finally had me flip over to rub the front which was 5 min before the thing was over so she flipped me over and rubbed the front of one leg and the other arm for about 1 min each and said OK you are done.
She was very pleasant personality, but had no clue how to provide the service of massage
The other think I found funny was she asked for payment up front which no one has ever done so I should have known then that something was wrong. I promptly went out to my car and called American Express and explained my story and asked them to refund the money and they did.
I would advice that everyone steer clear of this massage salon.
Cheers
Paul