Hell, Michigan

Think twice about going here. Then think again and again. DONT DO THE MINI GOLF. Seriously. I’m telling you guys I can’t remember the last time I’ve had such a terrible experience.
Okay so before I get into this I was SO excited to go to Hell. We even switched our vacation around so we could stop here, and I really, really wish we hadn’t.
We pull up outside of the store, a little smaller than I expected the «town» to be, but whatever still SO cool. We were literally in hell.
Walk into the store/​gift shop/​ice cream parlor and no one greets us. Literally only ONE other group there. There’s 3 workers, 2 older ladies and a young girl.
About 10 minutes into us shopping one of the older women who I’m guessing was a manager? Starts going off about someone using her lint roller. I shit you guys not she went off for at least another 10 minutes about the other ladies using her lint roller without asking first. SO UNPROFESSIONAL. Then she starts yelling at the young girl about the way she was folding t shirts. I really wish I could’ve gotten that ladies name because not only was it unprofessional to do in front of customers but the tone she was using toward the other 2 was absolutely not ok. AND IT WAS A LINT ROLLER (was I being punkd?)
Anyway we decide we gotta get outta the store so let’s play Mini golf! As we’re checking out we tell the lady (not the crazy one) we’d also like 2 rounds of mini golf. The crazy lady runs over and mumbles to the other employee «should I tell them about the holes» then looks directly at us and says «There’s birds on a part of the course that have a nest with eggs so they’re territorial and they’re very important to me so please avoid the hole. It’s even taped off. Those birds are important to me, don’t go near the nest.» WHY WOULD YOU NOT TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THAT. R U NUTS (obvi she is but still)
The mini golf is a joke. Omg. No score cards. There’s a sign before you start telling you to watch out for broken glass because they have vandalism. They weren’t kidding HELLA broken glass. The greens were torn up, the cups that sit in the holes were sticking up so high you couldn’t shoot the ball in. One hole had AT LEAST 5 spiders inside the cup (def skipped that one). To top it all off the «one» hole that was taped off because of the birds was actually 3. THREE.
So 18 holes — 3 bird holes — 1 spider infested hole = 14 holes (which over half had a cup too high to shoot the ball into)
Hell was literally worse than what I imagine actual Hell is like. I can’t believe they run the business how they do and actually charge people for that trash. I even feel like the review doesn’t give enough justice as to how terrible it was. If Hell was aiming for people to leave feeling like they wasted their time & money, mission accomplished.

Us local people are weird, and the tourists only a little less so,
In the summer, Hell is inundated with biker «groups» at times so beware, you might need to avert the kiddies eyes until you can get out of hell.
Bottom line, don’t expect much and you wont be disappointed.
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Much has changed in the past couple years in Hell so many of the reviews may be out of date. The Dam Site has changed hands since I last went there a few years ago and there is now a gift shop and the ice cream shop/​restaurant/​bar/​post office/​souvenir shop is next door.
So first, I can not comment on the Dam Site
The business with the post office is lovely. The staff are friendly and you can get a postage mark from hell. They even light a candle and singe your package for you. I have only seen the food but it looks like it was about what you would expect. But do not buy your souvenirs here! they have the same prices and a much better variety at the shop next door.
I an not sure what that shop is called but ‘Hell Hole’ came up on my cc receipt. The shop has all the funny things you would expect in a place called Hell. T shirts, shot glass, post cards as well as a bunch of Halloween inspired items such as rubber duckies with devil horns. I do have to mention that the woman running the shop took a bit of time to appear after we entered the shop and she was a bit strange when she did. Not in a good way, more in a Deliverance, hostile way. I was relieved she did not complement the prettiness of my mouth.
the golf course is better just to look at rather than play. There are lots of funny decorations but it is really run down and even when it was brand new, the course is just sadistic rather than challenging, what do you expect from the golf course from Hell?

Aw Hell no ! Hell has froze over?
I’m sure you are familiar with Polar vortex reviews in Milwaukee. Well, Hell was reserved for # 666 review.
I’m not sure if Hell is a town or a village. It’s just out side Ann Arbor I passed through here 2 years ago in March. It was actually fairly warm for spring unlike the past spring. And WTH it’s just hell here especially in the wintertime. Oh Hell yeah!
Food 0
Ambiance 3
Service 2
Location 2
Value 3 FREE BEER tomorrow!!!
⁵⁹⁄₂₀₁₄

Thank you Annette J. for giving Hell a place on Unilocal.
Having been there about two years ago I had to put my two cents in.
We travel to Ann Arbor a lot for business and I try to find new and exciting things to do.
I stumbled across Hell online and figured it would be a fun day trip and planned things to see along the way.
Probably a good idea as Hell consists of 3 buildings and when we got there only the gift shop and ice cream parlor was open.
The ice cream was pretty good, all of the topping were in a big bathtub and you could fill your sundae with whatever you wanted.
So yes, I can say we all left Hell with a huge stomach ache.
No, I’ll be honest my son and I had tummy aches my husband is much better at showing some kind of restraint.
Anyways, the staff was cool and we got to witness a wedding in Hell!
They were dressed up to theme and I guess the dreary weather fit as well.
The chapel is a sight on its own.
Plenty of Hell themed photo ops there to prove you made it out of hell.
What amused me was the men ice fishing at Hell lake,
so Hell DOES freeze over what now???

Somehow, I don’t think Dante had this in mind when he was penning the journey through the inferno.
Yes. There is a town called Hell, Michigan, named thusly in 1841 (or so the signage tells me), and it is small. Very small. Census tells me it has 266 residents only and the «downtown» consists of 3 buildings: a souvenir/​gift shop, Screams ice cream parlor and diner, and a «biker» bar called «Damn Site Inn.»
There is tons of signage around these 3 buildings, all with a playful edge and perfect for photo ops.“Greetings From Hell,” temperature in Hell, etc. This version of Hell is fun loving, not terrifying. Totally kid friendly. The activities themselves are pretty mundane, to be honest. Around the gift shop there is a small play area filled with painted wood cutouts for you to stick your head through and snap a photo (you can be a devil or a Sasquatch). There are also plywood games like «monkey poo toss» that you can throw some beanbags through plus a small, totally unchallenging, putt putt course. The neatest thing, I think, is the small chapel. Yes. You can get married in Hell. ROMANCE AIN’T DEAD, Y’ALL!
For $ 100 you can also be «mayor» of the town for the day. What does that mean? According to the website you get: A key to the town of Hell, an official badge with your name on it, ownership of one square inch of Hell (including a deed, vial of dirt and official landowner card), a set of devil horns to wear for the day, a proclamation naming the recipient as Hell’s mayor for that particular day, an «Official Mayor of Hell» T-​shirt with «Impeached» stamped across the back and a document confirming the impeachment.
In reality, there isn’t really all that much to do here. The real appeal and the novelty of the place is saying «I’m in Hell!» You won’t spend a whole day here but you can check in to Hell on your social media sites, snap a few photos, get an ice cream cone at the diner, some cool skull lights and a t-​shirt at the shop, and maybe a PBR at the bar. The people/​proprietors of the local businesses are really nice. VERY kind and welcoming and help make this place special.
So, yeah. I think Hell is ok. In reality I think I’d give the town about 3 stars but the novelty of saying «I’ve been to Hell and back» when someone asks you how your day was is pretty stellar. Plus everyone is so nice and that I had to bump it up to 4. If you’re passing through, I’d stop in. But I wouldn’t go out of your way to come here.