Xin Wenzhou Massage

OK, before I begin this review, let me go over my thought process when it comes to rating massage places. It should be divided into 2 different reviews, one for the establishment (ambiance, price, hygiene) and the other for the masseuse. Every masseuse has their own style — some are strong, some are too strong, some aren’t strong enough. Just like some people like no spice on their food or others can’t get enough spice, it’s very personal and what may be good for one is terrible for another.
So let’s start the review with the establishment. I’ve been going to Xin Wenzhou for a couple of years, and I’ve been going to Chinese massage houses for a long time. I started going to XW after my usual spot in Flushing closed down — something that happens on a regular basis in Flushing.
XW is located on the second floor, make sure you get the address right because there are similar places to the left and right. You know the deal — this is a no frills place, hence the best price in town. Small cubicles and sometimes soothing Chinese music playing, but often enough chatter between the different workers just trying to get through their work day. But I’m willing to forgive pretty much everything if my two requirements are met: a great massage at a great price. XW comes through on both.
It used to be $ 20 an hour before 5pm, but to get that price now, you must now pay for 5 hours ($ 100). As I always get two hours and have been going with my cousin every other Sunday, I just pay $ 100, subtract $ 80 for our 4 hours and carry over the next hour for another time (they give you a card with a membership number and cross index it with your phone number in an old-​school binder with loose-​leaf paper). A mandatory $ 10 an hour tip needs to be added, so my total cost for a 2 hour massage with tip is $ 60. You will not beat that price anywhere.
Now onto the masseuses. It would only be fair to rate the masseuses for their skills as everyone is different. I think the best masseuse there is Sophia — she uses JUST the right amount of pressure, because I’ve had massages with too much pressure and they are no fun. Sophia is the benchmark — and I think they know that there because as we are two people we need two masseuses and last week I had «Miu» who was a little stronger but awesome — different technique and both me and my cousin have gotten massages from her and we both agree she’s great. Note on «Miu». That’s what her name sounds like, but no one there writes in English and they couldn’t write her name on the card, except in Chinese characters.
He’s my advice. I have only once in a couple of years gotten a massage that was too hard — my cousin as well. It hurt for a couple of days afterwards. It’s not fun. But remember, it’s your body. If the masseuse is too strong, stop and tell her. Or start by saying not too strong, and then say «more strong», «more strong» until they get it right.
My experience with them is such that I will not go anywhere else. And You can call and ask to reserve Sophia in advance. Do this for the first time and you will not be disappointed. Unless you really like a bland massage.

In desperate need of a massage but wanting to avoid the exorbitant prices, I headed to Flushing knowing I’d find some great deals. I don’t need the flowing waterfalls, soothing music, or dang pandas running around, just a thorough massage to work out the killer pain and knots in my back and shoulders.
Flushing is saturated with body massage parlours, and plenty of non-​English speaking people to hand you business cards and flyers. What was my plan? Just pick a random spot and walk in. Seriously. I couldn’t even read the name of this business (thank you Google Translate!) but they boasted a $ 25/​hr full body massage (before 5pm). TWENTY FIVE dollars. An HOUR. WHAT. That’s outrageously amazing. Pfft, take my money!
This place also offers membership cards where you purchase 6 hours or so in advance for an even further discounted price.
You get a tiny private room closed off with a curtain and must remove all clothing but keep your underwear on. Hilariously, I heard a Chinese masseur yelling at the guy next door to me «SIR keep your underwear!!»
The woman I had was way too rough, used way too much pressure, worked way too close to my spine and did put pressure directly on it at points. When it came to knots, instead of slowly and methodically working them out with constant pressure, she just rubbed them really freakin’ hard and really fast.
I assure you, with no exaggeration, I walked out of here injured and bruised, feeling the pain for about 2 – 3 days after this massage. I wish I could have better instructed her, but the language barrier was a problem. I knew this coming in, but it really was my fault for not asking to go lighter. I don’t think it would have helped because this was not a body massage given by someone well-​experienced, but rather someone who just manhandles you.
Note, she did use oil, her elbows often (some people don’t like that), hot stones out of no where, mini facial massage with lotion (though I don’t know if she washed her hands prior.) and did climb on top of me to put full body weight on my back via her knees, which was fine, too.
I really didn’t get any warning with the hot stones, though. She left the room for a few seconds, then came back and just put them on me. Only after I jumped slightly she said «hot stones!» No shit. Thanks for the heads up.
Anyway, this was the most disappointing, painful massage in my lifetime, and I have a very high tolerance for pain. I also have had plenty of massages where it hurts for the moment, but you walk out feeling like a million bucks. Instead, I left here feeling like a battered wife.
Keep in mind you –must– tip the masseurs a minimum of $ 10.
If you speak Chinese and can better direct the masseurs here, you might have a good experience, but I did not. One thing is for sure, and that’s the fact that the price is unbeatable.