William Brooks Elementary School

Although I have long since finished my years at Brooks, I still retain fond memories of going to school here. I lived nearby and walking was the best way to get to school. This provided many hours of developing a skill for internal contemplation. Also, I got very good at kicking the same rock to school and then home.
I’m not sure how useful a review of an institution I attended well over a decade will be; perhaps you want to know how your children will turn out.
I was here when they changed from the Brooks Badgers to the Brooks Bears. I think that helped me realize as an eight-​year-​old that mascots are bullshit.
I learned to «just say no» here and have since said no at least two-​thousand times.
I developed my first crushes here and they never resulted in any teen pregnancies.
I learned to ford a river, kill buffalo, and bury my sister who died of malaria playing a mess of Oregon Trail.
I’ve never been arrested, so they must have taught me how to commit crimes and cover my tracks. Kidding. Sort of.
An on-​site vegetable garden taught me that you can eat raw beans. Or anything green and in a garden, really.
I am actively involved in my community and spend time crime-​fighting thanks to the superhero appreciation day in the fifth grade. That’s probably a false memory, but at least I’m crime-​fighting and that’s what counts.
I would give this five stars, but there were two huge drug busts in houses within a quarter mile of the school within the last few years. Also, I’m still bitter that I got away without actually learning long division. Then again, I made it through college without learning long division and every gadget invented in the past ten years comes with a calculator anyway.