Paddy O’ Splaines

Um, this place has been closed for a long time now.

Like a lot of reviewers here, I wanted this place to be great, because it’s so convenient to my home. It’s not great. It’s not even good. It’s kind of gross. I don’t know how they stay in business because it’s almost always empty. the food is not all that terrific, and the servers have the uncanny ability to forget you’re there, even though you may be the only customer in the restaurant. It’s like eating lunch in an Kafka-​esque nightmare. Nothing makes sense. If they can’t get customers, can’t get the food right, have this fakey, cheap Ashley Furniture décor, and they don’t even LIKE you when you come to eat there, WHY do they stay in business? WHY? WHY? In short, much better restaurants within easy walking distance of this place. Go to those.

Worst. New Year’s. Ever.
We came last year at the insistance of my husband and his friends. Since the bar was usually not busy, they assumed (accurately) it wouldn’t be on NYE. Though emptier than I would have preferred, it was pretty nice. $ 50 all you can drink, a prime rib dinner (we ate elsewhere AND I’m a vegetarian), and great sevice since it wasn’t busy. There were about 12 of us and there were maybe 20 other people there.
This year, we’d hoped for the same. The package was the same this year, with an all-​you –can eat appetizer bar. Again, we ate elsewhere (we have an annual dinner at another restaurant, which is 1.) a tradition, and 2.) vegetarian friendly since about ¼ of the people don’t eat fish or meat). I got nervous when my husband told me that when he picked up the tickets the manager said he’d booked a comedy show, DJ, & «the best bar band in Chicago.» But, I remained hopeful that since there are 2 rooms, if we didn’t care for the entertainment we could retreat to the other room.
Nope.
The entertainment was forced on us. In fact, we were in the OTHER room, but the speaker was up SO high it was louder than in the room WITH the performance. We asked the waitress 3 times if she could turn down the volume, 3 times she said yes, and 3 times she did nothing.
First, the band. They were probably the worst band I’d ever heard. It was primarily the singer, who was often off-​key. And «Sitting on the Dock of the Bay?» Way to rock. It was so bad that my husband was insistant that it was karaōke. When 3 songs with the same singer had gone by, he was forced to admit that it was, in fact, «the best bar band in the city.»
Next, the comedians. Ugh. I know it is a damn hard job, but it just went very badly for them. It was painful to hear the pause for laughter over & over. Worse still, they kept yelling into the mic! The MC was the worst cuplrit. If you have ever been sitting next to a speaker while someone screamed into it, you understand how ear-​shattering it is. Now, had they not done that I would probably would have enjoyed it slighlty more. In any case, comedy is a destination thing. You go to see it; you shouldn’t have it forced on you. It’s NYE, we wanted music & conversation. The comedians probably knew it, too, which is why they came into the back room to ask each table to please come in the other room & watch. By 10:30 I was so tired of screaming over the band, and worse yet the comedians (since it’s easier to talk over music than someone talking into a mic at that volume), I just gave up on my night & waited for it to be late enough for me to leave. But, the entertainment didn’t end there!
Finally, they brought in a DJ, & when it was his turn I thought «THANK GOD!» But the DJ played dance & house music, which I have no problem with at all, but this is an Irish sports bar where people are playing Wii sports & beer pong and there is nothing resembling a dance floor.
This bar is trying way too hard. They wanted to do everything at once, but they didn’t really think it through.
Other problems with our night: service. The waitress here, in addition to completely disregarding out repeated requests to turn down the speaker, could not figure out our order. She found it completely incomprehensible that we didn’t all want food, so when 5 out the 12 ordered entrees to get their money’s worth, she kept trying to bring the rest of us food. She tried 4 times to bring 2 salmon dishes over. We kept saying «No one else ordered,» but 5 minutes later she’d be back asking who got the salmon. As one of our group remarked «She’s gonna do that all night unless we have a plate in front of us. Maybe we should order so she stops.»
The only thing that save this from being a one star review is that some of the group started to have fun by the end of the night. A couple people said that it was fine because they got drunk fast trying to tune out the band! Ha! That being said, I WOULD go back, but only if there was no entertainment.

Underwhelmed at best.
Completely awful service. We had to wait quite some time to get our food. It came out wrong– it took three people to finally get it right. The manager halfheartedly apologized.
I know it’s sort of a hole in the wall, but the prices of the draft and food don’t reinforce it’s attitude.
I wouldn’t go back.
I only gave it 2 stars because the mac and cheese was pretty fantastic.

OK — We bought a coupon/​discount from
. We bought it in May and had a year to use it. Sadly they changed owner’s since then and they would not accept the coupon, initially. The manager did offer to give us a discount equal to the price we paid for the coupon, but not honor the whole coupon. (This is where they get the only star I could award.) We ordered a beer and some apps. After a good 10 minutes of the only waitress in the place scurrying back and forth, we get the pitcher of beer. As the waitress pours, we are informed that they only take cash, as their credit card machine/​computer was «down». We were there to have dinner and drinks and had a group of 8 total expecting to show. The place was suited to hold the group because honestly, there really wasn’t anyone else there, which I initially thought was odd for a Friday night. And… now I know why.
The kitchen looked dead/​empty. Not at all inviting and I really did not feel like it was a place I wanted to eat at. We waited and just decided it was too much trouble and we all did not have enough cash to support a night of eating dinner and hanging out for a while. Credit card usage was really just a necessity for us. We got up and left after the one beer and met the rest of our group somewhere else.
All in all, we were terribly disappointed with the place, service, ambiance, etc. We won’t be going back, as it really is not worth the trouble. There really are too many GOOD to GREAT places in the area to even make the effort to go here.

For shame. They changed management in the new year and although they’ve really tried to improve with excellent prices, their food plainly sucks. Don’t get the discounted meat entrees through the week, and the veggie wrap has since been discontinued.
Their fries are good and the manager was friendly, giving us his business card and asking to call next time we come in for maybe discounts on food (and our drinks were on the house), sadly, we’ll never be back. With so many delicious restaurants around, it’s hard to go back somewhere when you know the food won’t be up to par.
Sad.

Great place to have a party, very laid back cool people run this joint.
Big private room with a big screen TV with wii.
They have good food specials!
Great drink specials!
Not sure why they have such a low rating but its hogwash!

I’m giving this place one star because it’s a nice big open space and one star because… well, it’s better than a vacant lot or an abandoned warehouse.
Somewhere in the city there are apparently a lot of pudgy white people who feel that trucking out to the burbs in their SUVs for bland corporate family casual food is too much trouble, what with having to remember which one of their children is named Hannah and which is Dylan. This place is made for them. And Hannah and Dylan.
When you park your (probably well marbled) hams at O’Splaine’s, you are within a couple of blocks of some of the best Thai, Middle Eastern, and South American (to name a few) restaurants in Chicago. And you’re going to have a chicken bacon buffalo wrap with bacon bleu cheese ranch and a side of fries? And a not particularly good one at that? And have a 20% gratuity added to your check unannounced because you wanted a separate check? Ugh.
Yeah, so, there’s lots of places like this. O’Donovan’s — a few blocks away on Irving Park — has a much more interesting menu and some character to boot. So why am I hating on Paddy O’Splaine’s? I mean, bland uninspired food is obviously loved by everyone who goes to Frichilibee’s Garden.
It’s the name. It really is. Ten bucks says there’s no real person named Paddy O’Splaine. So they were trying to signal «Irish Bar» and instead screamed it in your face. Why not just name it «Drunky McFightsalot?» It’d be less offensive. And it doesn’t matter, because this place has as much Irish character as Barack Obama.
And before you ask, Einstein Bros ticks me off for the same reason. When I want to convince someone my bagels are made by actual Jews, I’m going to call it Moishe Goldberg’s Kvetchtorium.

You broke my heart again Paddy O’Splaines. After passing on Bad Dog AND Bowman’s to come here for the Hawks game on Friday night I was again disappointed. As my review has said previously, this place is beautiful. It’s clean, it’s big, it has an open kitchen, ample TVs etc.
The bottom line however is that if after 25 minutes of being seated I am left still staring at only a glass of water and I haven’t seen my waitress, I can’t give you even a halfway decent review.
I went to POS (hah!) Friday for the Hawks game and showed up around the start of the 2^nd period. The place was very busy, but if you run a sports bar you should anticipate that kind of crowd for the Stanley Cup Finals in which the local team is playing.
My wife and I waited about five minutes for a table and were seated in what can only be described as an improvised section of tables just inside the door to the left. It’s a poor location because it’s obvious the tables are just mashed in there to get more butts in seats for $$.
And then we waited…
15 minutes goes by and we haven’t seen our waitress. One appears to tell us that our waitress is on her way, but until then, would we like something to drink? Sure. Half price bottles of wine? Done, let’s have some!
And then we waited…
Another 10 minutes goes by and the bottle of wine has not appeared. So I got up and went to the other side of the restaurant and found the waitress that took our wine order, told her to cancel it and we left.
Here’s the thing. It is so frustrating for this to happen to me on two separate occasions. I want this bar to succeed. It’s closer to my apartment and I prefer the size and feel of it compared to a place like Bad Dog. But with terrible service, what motivation do I have to go?
The servers, food and drink are all superior at a place like Bad Dog even if it can get a little crowded.

UPDATE:
The new mgmt has worked out the kinks. Prices have gone up though with changes to the menu. New staff are attentive and good. They just changed the weekly specials however, so the $ 5 Wednesday pitchers are gone. Sadly that means I won’t be back. Who wants all you can eat pasta and half price wine when it’s 85 degrees outside? If the Wednesday pitchers come back I will too.

I was there for a birthday outing last month. Apparently patrons were allowed to park at the Aldi across the street after it closed.
For whatever reason, they no longer at this agreement in effect on the night we came. No sign or mention was made of this until AFTER my car along with my three friends’ cars were towed! When we mentioned this to the employees here, they basically said «Oh yeah, our patrons are not allowed to park there anymore, that just happened about a couple of weeks ago…» You’d think they’d take out a two minutes put up a sign by the front door letting customers so they can avoid the $ 170 tow fee!
Aside from that, no redeeming qualities. This place just sucks overall — boooo!

First, some background. I can walk to Paddy O’s in about 5 minutes, so I really wish it well. Nothing against Rockwell Grill (my other five minute bar-​walk option) but I don’t have kids and its like dodge-​strollers in there every time I walk by. So am I rooting for you Paddy O’s!
However, your Unilocal reviews have sucked for a LOOOONG time. So I stayed away. You hooked me just once. You flyered the neighborhood about a year and a half ago about a Jammy Jam. You may not know this about me Paddy O’s, BUT I NEVER MISS A GOOD JAMMY JAM! So I went, hoping for a little Kid ‘n Play House Party action.
Remember the scene in Sixteen Candles when the dorks all pay $ 2 (or was is $ 1?) to see girl’s underwear in the bathroom at the school dance? Every guy in that bathroom grew up, went to this Jammy Jam, and was at the Paddy O’s Jammy Jam ogling the waitresses. It was a little weird. Somehow, Paddy O’s you messed up the Jammy Jam.
But some time has passed. There is a new banner up that says «under new management». This sounds hopeful. They also advertised a Friday $ 13 all-​you-​can-​eat fried shrimp special. I loves me some bulk shrimp. It had been a crappy week anyway, so I suggested to my wife we go. I already had a light buzz and low expectations from a crappy week — seemed like the right time to check Paddy O’s out again!
So we walk in, committed to staying. No walking in and then out (Did I mention we left the Jammy Jam without ordering, it was THAT creepy). Find a couple of seats at the bar. Beer order taken quickly, off to a good start. Bartender’s first night. We are understanding people, so frankly this probably works in the bar’s favor again — lowered expectations.
We got our orders in. The shrimp deal starts with bread and salad. The butter for the bread came, but in the entire time we were there the bread never did. The salad was lame. Lettuce only, a bit watery like it had not been dried well after washing. At least it was washed. I’m not too worried about this though, I did not come for salad.
Main event, plate one of shrimp. Came with 6 plus fries. Seems reasonable, all you can eat shouldn’t mean gorge out of the gates, right? Fries were tasty as were the shrimps. I burn through that and order another plate. My wife is about a third through the the reuben she ordered at this point.
Fast forward to about 45 minutes later — a second and third basket or shrimp finally come. At the same time. It took forever! My wife was all done with her meal already.
So here’s the bottom line as I realize I have been droning on for a while now.
FOOD
Fried stuff is good. Hard to mess up. My wife’s reuben was decent/​ok. At $ 6 it was priced right. I respect that — we’ve paid $ 12 for that exact same sandwich at other bars. If you are basically getting the corned beef off the deli aisle package, charge accordingly. If you want a fresher sandwich go elsewhere and pay for it. Overall I think the food here actually seems to work in spite of the salad sucking. You pay for cheap food and you get cheap food here — there is a market for this.
SERVICE
Well, at least is wasn’t offensive. I get the impression from past reviews that people were really treated poorly. The bartender on her first night was very kind, and it doesn’t seem like her fault the kitchen can’t get some shrimps fried for me. Everyone eating at the bar seemed to be waiting around a lot, so there still seems to be a lot left to be reconfigured by the new management. I did think it was curious the bartender had to go to the kitchen herself and get the food leaving the bar unattended. Don’t most places have food runners?
OVERALL
They might be able to get to three stars someday. In the mean time, for cheap food and low expectations, it’s a perfectly reasonable way to mail in an evening. I would not take out of town guest here, though, or go here for food expecting to be blown away.

I decided to come by here on a Sunday night with a friend. We were in the neighborhood, I hadn’t been here since the joint first opened, and I was curious to see: A) if it was still open; and B) if it still kind of sucked.
Yes. And yes.
As on past trips, the place was empty; my friend and I were two of approximately 12 patrons. The weird old couple in the booth directly across from us that were arguing very loudly (read: literally yelling) about what a DJ is (?) were two others.
As mentioned by others, the menu is very diverse. I had the buffalo chicken wrap. I’d give it a «C», although the tater tots on the side were «A» material. My friend had the corned beef and cabbage «since it [was] an Irish place.» It was the scariest corned beef I’ve ever seen; they were like spears of beef. (His review, «Well, I mean, it tasted like beef, I guess.») On the upside, however, Paddy’s prices are low.
The service was better than on past trips, but that’s not saying much. Our server was friendly, although not the sharpest blade in the knife block (e.g., «What type of white wine do you have?» «Merlot? Is that a white wine? I can never remember»). She was also very attentive, almost to the point of obtrusiveness (e.g., giving us the hard sell on dessert while my friend was still eating his corned spears; stopping by to tell us to have a good night three times in about ten minutes). Maybe she was new, maybe she was distracted by the weird, old, fighting couple who, based on the tongue-​lashing they gave her, waited an extremely long time for their food (we actually received our entrees before them although they’d clearly been there for a while).
Someone whom I can only assume was a manager also came by to ask how our entrees were, and by «ask» I mean «demand to know if we liked the food in a manner that suggested he would slap us around a bit if we answered in the negative.» The proudly-​advertised «new management» is a little rough.
All in all, Paddy’s is a place I just don’t understand. It’s the phoniest Irish joint ever. The menu is affordable and all over the place. The service is – based on my first few trips here compared with this most recent trip – either non-​existent or kind of in your face. The space itself is nice, clean and open, but it’s always dead. The new management, while I’m no regular, seems a helluva lot like the old management. It’s the kind place where you walk in and say, «Hey, this place looks nice,» and walk out scratching your head.

I logged in this morning to basically say the same thing as JB… we live in the neighborhood and have been going to Paddy’s to give them support over the past year, but felt that the food could’ve been a little better and it seemed pricey for what you got.
Went there this past weekend and big change due to new management. Seemed like the prices were cut in half on both beer and food. Wife and I split a salad and it was some of the best greens I’ve seen served in Lincoln Square. I also got a pizza which I don’t normally order at a bar, but it was awesome. I’m definately going to throw them into our delivery/​carry out mix for pizza. It was also the most crowded I’ve seen them since we’ve been going there. Sounds like they’re going to start implementing a «membership rewards» program.
Only real downfall is parking… they do have meter spots directly in front but if you don’t get one of them, parking can be limited. We have kids and like bringing them to Paddy’s because it is somewhat open, non-​cramped and they have the Wii. A little bummed they took the pool table out because it was a good distracition as well, but at least they have the Wii still.

Great beer specials! Cheapest imports I’ve seen in Lincoln Square.
I live in the neighborhood and had stopped in a few times over the past few years and really liked the vibe but felt it was a bit pricey.
We dropped in last night and, man, what an improvement! Drinks are much cheaper than I remembered, and the service was great. Apparently they are now under new management. The manager went out of his way to make sure we had everything we needed. Very pleasant experience.

Paddy’s got some explainin’ to do.
The bar/​restaurant is nice and upscale. The granite bartop and freshwater aquarium (with colorful cichlids) are wonderful touches. The menu is straightforward with bar favorites like burgers and onion rings, but there are dinner entrees like steak available. Not surprisingly, there isn’t much for vegetarians to eat here. I’m not rating the food at Paddy O’ Splaines.
The service was atrocious. I met my friend for lunch. He had already ordered and received a veggie wrap. The only time I communicated with the waitress at the bar was when I asked for the menu. Since then, they never came back. There were two, an older and younger lady. The older waitress was simply slow. That’s not a big deal. When her shift ended, no one (seemed to) took over her customers, and she couldn’t be bothered by anyone else. She was done and she left.
The other waitress was clueless. She was either new or incompetent. She stood at the end of the bar watching TV, checking her phone, and ignored her customers. I wanted to order a drink or two, maybe an appetizer, but it never happened because NO one came. My friend and I could’ve watched the rest of the World Cup qualifier match, but the service was so terrible that ordering anything would just prolong the experience. My friend flagged down the younger waitress for the bill, paid it, and left immediately.
You should not go out of your way here.
Note: I’m extremely tempted to select «No» for Waiter Service.

Have I truly been lucky to only have given one place a one star review since I’ve been Unilocaling? Yes but now I can add another as Paddy O’Splaines will be my second.
I was there recently for a friends going away party and how appropo was it that it felt like this place needed a similar party. It was pretty dead for a Friday night and I just can’t imagine why a bar laid out as nice as this always seems like no one knows its here. My question was answered by the end of the night that’s for sure.
1. Unless I was one of the 3 or 4 regulars that visit this place, I had an uninviting sense while I was here. I felt the same way the first time I came here but apparently didn’t learn a thing that time around.
2. Nice bar setup but seriously why bother if your selections are just the bare minimum. It’s an Irish bar so it has to have Guinness but they really didn’t knock it out the box with other selections. They even served someone Guinness in a differently marked glass. This place wasn’t busy so where can those Guinness mugs have gone?
3. They have a huge kitchen and I thought I would give the lonely chefs some work so I asked the bar keep if the kitchen was open. I received a no and thought I snooze I lose. A group walks in and sits in a both around the same time I asked for food … guess who got food and who didn’t! Hint — I’m the one writing a 1 star review!
If I had to guess, I think because only the bartender and one server were working the front, a successful evening was against the odds. Even so, it was a Friday night and if they roll this way then it is saying something.

Yes, the legend is true. 99% of the time you see me, I’m either on medication, high or drunk. I have just learned my way to make memories while under either of those conditions. Most of the time they are accurate and sometimes just plain olé hallucination.
Work with me while I try to recreate my latest visit to this joint. In my head. I was fairly buzzed when I walked in and then few drinks later, I was gone (or so my sources tell me).
From outside this place looks like a perfect place for yuppies to share their love for Cubs since that’s what they are supposed to do in Chicago but once you walk in, it has a feeling of one of those re-​modeled Jewish diners in New York.
We were a group of 12 of so people who aged from mid-​20s to early 60s and staff was very accommodating in terms of our requests to move tables together and what not.
Here is the blurry part: I don’t remember if it was someone in our group who ordered something with fries or I just decided to pick up some fries from some stranger’s plate but they were good.
They seem to have daily specials on drinks food and other menu items are reasonable for this area. Looks like a good place for a family to eat while watching Cubs going down. Very yuppie thing to do.
In short, good place to have a small to medium size party. Food seems decent. Staff is good with you and menu items are reasonably priced.
Enough street parking nearby and bathrooms are clean.
Place is good. Not 4 or 5 star good but Jewish diner good. Give it a shot.

So they’ve totally screwed the pooch this time.
I’ve been a big fan for awhile– I’ve never had anything but their cheeseburgers, but I’ve never wanted anything else. But man oh man did they mess up a good thing.
Used to be, you could get grilled onions and sauteed mushrooms on your burger at no cost. Now, they offer no such amenities. Without the extras, it’s just a really standard burger.
And they raised their prices somewhere along the line. Used to be, you could get said hamburger, with cheese and bacon, for like, $ 10. Sure that’s a bit pricey, but it was honestly worth it. NOW, same burger goes for $ 12 or so bucks, depending on options. Bacon is $ 2, cheese is $ 1.
AND the second to last time I ordered, they forgot my bacon. Now normally that’s not a huge deal, but Christ, you’re paying $ 2 for it… And it’s not really the kind of thing worth calling and complaining about, so you just lose $ 2 and have a hole in your colon where the bacon should go.
AND tonight when the delivery guy showed up, he gave me my total, $ 28.42, and I gave him $ 40, asking him for $ 5.00 back. Now I don’t know what the fuck this guy was expecting, but he huffed and puffed while searching for my five… Seriously, Miguel? You’re bitching about a $ 6.50 tip? Fuck you! Why’d you take away my onions and mushrooms?!

Woe be to ye who eats/​orders here. Prepare thyself for the soggiest delivery food on the planet. Really, I HATE giving one star reviews, in fact I feel very guilty about it, but if the shoe fits!!!
The first encounter I had with Paddy O’Splaines was driving by and seeing this yuppy looking bar in the middle of nowhere. Me and two friends were heading to watch the Cubs game and we went in. The bar was mostly empty and there was no hostess or anyone welcoming us in, so we left. The place looked nice with dim lights, lots of TVs, new wood and fancy smanciness that is not typically found on that block. Whatever.
Let’s fast forward to this week. This week I went and ordered a pizza, some wings and fries. The deliverman came within the estimated arrival time, so kudos for that. It was all downhill after the deliveryman dropped off the food.
First of all, they charged me $ 6 for eight wings. Generally I don’t mind and they had the good graces to pop in some carrots, lettuce and bleu cheese. Here’s the catch: EVERYTHING WAS SOGGY. I don’t know how you do it, but even the carrots got soggy. Soggy carrots! Who’da thunk! By the time the wings got here, I could have just reached in my fridge, pulled out frozen wings, popped them in the oven they would have tasted better than this soggy mess. I mean seriously, it was like they took frozen wings, popped it in a microwave and sent it to me.
Now, let’s get into the pizza. It did not come in the usual white box with the Italy cartoon map etc, the pizza came in some brown cardboard box. I am supposing they do this to cut down on expenses. Now here’s the problem with having this cheap cardboard box, it’s like using one-​ply tp instead of two-​ply tp. In fact, this damn cardboard box was so weak, my entire glass table was wet from condensation off of the box.
Not only this, but this was the damn soggiest pizza I had ever eaten in my life. In the rush to get this pizza out to me on time, they botched the pie! There is a drop on my floor from the sauce from the pizza from yesterday that I just noticed is on my floor so now I have to clean it up. I ate two small slices of this pizza and immediately put it into the fridge due to its poor texture.
OH wait, there’s more! Not only did they give me a swampy pizza, but the pizza cutter they used musta been broken or something because every damn piece stuck to each other ripping off more soggy mess every damn place.
Today I ate some leftover pizza by putting it in the oven so I could crispen it up. BAD decision, it didn’t work and of course all of the topping rips off on first bite. Where is the pleasure derived from eating this pizza???
Food to me is good due to taste and TEXTURE. If you serve me a big old mess of sloppy sogginess, I will award you the giant ONE STAR REVIEW!