Golden Fried Chicken

We ordered delivery from this place through
. Email confirmation estimated 60 minutes for delivery, which I think is ridiculous, but isn’t atypical for Albany. (Don’t get me started on that.) After 90 minutes, I call to check on it. This guy answers, «Hello?» and there is no background noise at all — it sounds like just any random dude answering his phone at home — so I think that I’ve gotten the wrong number. But no, he confirms this is indeed Golden Fried Chicken. He goes on to tell me that the driver is on «his» way with my food, that «she» took a lot of orders so «she’s» just going in order and will get to me soon.
Side note: Every single time I have called a restaurant in this town to check on a delivery, the answer is always, «The driver is on the way!» or «The driver just left!» My favorite is when they say the driver just left, and I call back 30 minutes later and they say the driver just left *again*.
So, at just barely shy of the two-​hour mark, the driver — who is in fact a he, not a she — calls to check the address (he can’t read the writing that was given to him) and shows up a few minutes later. Perfectly polite, but no apology for the two-​hour wait.
So now we’ve waited for two hours for fried chicken, and it’s not like we were expecting fantastic cuisine in the first place. I mean, come on, it’s delivery fried chicken. But still, this was even worse than expected. For one thing, everything was of course quite cold by this point. But I don’t think it would have been any better fresh out of the «oven» or «pan» (read: microwave). Our order included mozzarella sticks, fried chicken, mashed potatoes/​gravy, fried fish, and french fries. None of it was even slightly good, and I would not be surprised if you told me that every single item came out of the frozen aisle at Price Chopper. We each got through about half of our food before heading into the kitchen to make some microwave ramen noodles for an improved second half of dinner.
So basically my impression of this place is that it’s run by a guy with bad handwriting, microwaving frozen grocery store food out of his kitchen at home, probably getting his friends to make deliveries — and you can’t really blame them for the ludicrously slow delivery given that he probably pays them in crappy frozen mozzarella sticks.
I almost gave two stars because at least they got our order correct and complete, which not every place can manage. But Unilocal characterizes one star as «Eek! Methinks not» and two stars as «Meh. I’ve experienced better», and I definitely feel more «Eek!» than «Meh.»