The Cork Screw Inn

I have been looking forward to writing this review and believe my thinking has benefited from the time between departing The Corkscrew Inn and returning home.
First off, the physical facility is really quite wonderful. The owner, Wayne, has meticulously built, updates and maintains The Corkscrew Inn to a very high standard. There are 5 themed rooms — British India, French, Art Deco, Arizona and Edwardian — on offer and we took refuge in the Art Deco room.
We selected The Corkscrew Inn based on 2 criteria: it was the best looking B & B we viewed on line after a lengthy search and it was only blocks from our son and daughter-in-law’s home. So, the location was convenient for visiting our grown children and the schlep to downtown is not onerous.
The owner, Wayne is perhaps an acquired taste or one needs to be so filled with awe, joy and wonder at the beauty of The Corkscrew Inn that Wayne’s foibles go unnoticed.
Allow me to start off by summarizing a few minor annoyances. Our bed in the Art Deco Room would benefit from new mattress as it introduced me for the first time ever to my sciatic nerve. The towels smelled musty. My wife and I don’t much like being treated poorly when we decide to not eat breakfast.
As you will have noted from my other reviews dear reader, I am in love with food. I love to eat, smell, savor, share and write about food.
I am not so fond of food that is plated to resemble faces. A moose portrait sculpted on a half kiwi with eyes, nose and mouth drawn with mango sauce and antlers of a green sprig of something or another is, well, a bit much. And the omelet rolled in the fashion of a linen serviette, bent upward to form a smile topped off by a banger (sausage) nose and cherry tomato eyes does not in this reviewers eyes score big points.
And now let me turn attention to Wayne’s annoying habit of pacing about dining room whilst attempting to enjoy my moose-​faced breakfast and chat with other lodgers. This pacing and not really knowing what Wayne might do next was punctuated by him grabbing your plate the moment you laid fork and knife on plate.
And finally our departure. As my lovely wife and I were hefting our bags out the front door, Wayne scampered up the stairs toward our vacated room in lieu of sending us off with a hearty thank you and assistance with luggage.
Based on our experience I can only believe Wayne’s final behavior was explained by him either A) attempting to be an attentive inn keeper, checking that his valued guests left no valuables behind in their room or B) wanting to verify that we didn’t attempt to steal away with a faux painting, lamp, chest of drawers or some other item of furniture we were somehow able to stash in our roller luggage.
The Corkscrew Inn is housed in a wonderfully restored home in the Vancouver bedroom community of Kitsilano. If the owner would act a bit less like the mad captain in the wheel house and more like my preferred stay-​in-​the-​background inn keeper, I might return.